When this is all over
by Callofthefan
Summary: They promised that they would be waiting for each other. When it was all said and done, they would finally be together and nothing or no one would ever keep them apart again.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3 **

**I found the ending didn't make sense at all. When I read about the indoctrination theory, it started to come together. This is what happens to my Shepard and Kaidan after it's all over.**

**Also try to guess what Kaidan says in French. He went to a French immersion school when he was younger.**

***This has been reedited and has some ideas from the extended DLC.**

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_"When this is all over, I'm going to be waiting for you, you'd better show up." she spoke as her lips trembled_

"_Don't get me wrong! I'm going to fight like hell for the chance to hold you again, but listen there's something's I want to say." he said as he took her hand and entwined it with his._

_"Looking back I have a few regrets." he sighed looking down at her_

_She looked up into his eyes, her blues looking into his amber. She knew what regrets he was talking about. She took her hand and cupped his face, letting him know that she had already forgiven him. It was her fault as much as his._

_He took her hand and kissed it lightly and continued with what was on his mind  
"but not many that's amazing right?"_

_He looked up at the destroyed buildings right in front of them._

_"Messed up kid I was, never would have dreamed of the life I've had," He turned his head back at her and looked up into her pierce blue eyes "And I owe a lot of that to you, you know."_

_Their eyes locked on each other, her throat felt like it was closing in her._

_"It's been a hell of a ride..." she choked out; her eyes not leaving his gaze._

_"It sure has." _

"_But how are you holding up, scared?"He asked_

_"Damn right I'm scared!"_

_He saw the fire rise in her eyes. The same fire that had driven her to this point. The very ones that had made him fall in love with her._

_"But that fears going to keep me alive long enough to strike those bastards right through the heart." she said as her teeth clenched together_

_"Yeah exactly." he smirked_

_She looked him in the eye again, waiting for him to make his move. She hesitated as he wasn't moving towards her. All she wanted was to hold him until it was time to go, but the solider in her stopped her._

_"So...take care major "she said as she started to walk away; but was then suddenly grabbed by the shoulders. He took her into his arms and leaned in to kiss her lips. As their lips touched the kiss deepened and they passionately hung on to each other not wanting to ever let go. He pulled back and brought his forehead up against hers._

_"I can't lose you again Kay." he choked out as he tried to hold back the tears forming in his eyes._

_He looked into hers and saw her trying to do the same. His hand reached up and wiped her tears away. _

_She let his hand linger on her cheek, and closed her eyes._

"_I love you Kay "he whispered into her ear" When this is all over, Je vais être en attente sur l'autel"_

_"I love you too Kaidan" she pulled back a little and took his hand over her heart "This heart never has and never will stop beating for you, no matter what happens"_

_He looked down at her, tears finally letting go and for what might be the last time he might see her, he kissed her sweet lips, just one last time._

_..._

Kaidan panted as he ran behind Shepard as they ran to the conduit. His Heart almost stopped when he saw a Mako hurdling towards her. She quickly duck under the last minute and Kaidan rushed to her. While he was running he suddenly saw a overturned Mako crashing towards him.

"KAIDAN!" screamed Shepard.

He jumped, and managed to avoid the Mako but felt the explosion hit him behind his legs.

Shepard jumped over a damaged Mako and ran towards Kaidan. She helped him up and threw his arms over her shoulders and helped him to cover.

"Normandy do you copy!" she yelled into her comm. piece. "I need an evac, right now!"

"Shepard" Kaidan panted as he held the wound on his leg "What are you doing?

"We're taking heavy loses up here Commander" Jokers voice crackled over the radio. "On our way Commander!"

Kaidan looked over Shepard's shoulder and saw the Normandy approaching.

"Come on." Shepard said as she threw his arms over her shoulder again as she lead him towards the Normandy.

"Kay..." Kaidan barely got out, "What are you doing... we need to go back, it's our only chance!"

Shepard ignored Kaidan and kept on going towards the Normandy, with Garrus and James behind them.

The hangar bay ramp opened and two marines came out, covering them until they got onto the ramp.

"Here, take him..." Shepard said as she gently passed Kaidan to James.

"Kay... What are you doing?" Kaidan said as James grabbed him.

She descended down the ramp and turned around.

"You got to get out of here." She said in a determined voice.

"Noo!" Kaidan shook his head "That's not going to happen Kay!"

"Don't argue with me Kaidan..." Shepard said with pleading eyes.

Kaidan shook his head again. He couldn't believe what was happening.

"Don't leave me behind! I promised I would never leave your side again!" he cried.

She felt her eyes starting to water up. She walked back towards Kaidan.

"No matter what..." She said as she approached him, "Know that I love you. Always." She cupped his face with her hands.

"I love you, too." He got out as he closed his eyes from the pain and quickly opened them up and looked into her eyes.

She let her hand go and slowly started her way down the ramp; still looking at Kaidan.

He reached out for her. "No Kay you can't do this again! Not after what happened when you told me to leave on the SR1 and I lost you!"

She felt a tear go down her face as she saw the look on Kaidan's face, and his arm still reaching out for her.

She looked behind her and saw Harbinger getting ready for another round.

"Go!" She shouted at Kaidan, James and Garrus.

"NOO!" Kaidan shouted as he reached out, trying to get out of James grip.

"Let go of me Vega!"

"Major you're injured; you won't make it to the beam with her..." James started as Kaidan struggled under his hold.

"She can't do this, not again!" Kaidan shouted as he continued to struggle under James heavy arm.

"Kay!"

She was running towards the conduit. Kaidan's face fell.

"_No, not again. I'm not going to abandon her this time." Kaidan thought._

With little strength he had left, Kaidan quickly punched James in the stomach and ran out of the Normandy.

"Major!" James shouted as he and Garrus ran after Kaidan.

"Shepard!" Kaidan shouted as he tried to run up to catch her.

He saw Shepard 20 feet in front of him, running along side of a Hammerhead Mako. He didn't get too far before he fell to the ground, as his leg gave up from the execrating pain.

"AHH!" he clenched his teeth as the pain radiated through his leg. An explosion went off beside him and Kaidan felt himself flare up a barrier. Something felt wrong, the back of his head went numb and suddenly he collapsed.

Garrus was the one to get to Kaidan first. He saw two husks coming at him and quickly picked Kaidan up into his arms.

"COVER ME!" Garrus yelled at James.

James nodded as he shot down the husks as they ran back towards the Hangar Bay ramp.

Garrus quickly ran up the ramp, and into the Hangar Bay.

"GO JOKER NOW!" He yelled.

The Hangar bay doors closed and the Normandy took off.

Garrus gently laid Kaidan on the ground.

"Quickly get a stretcher!" He yelled at the marine who was standing beside him. He then turned to one of the Marines that were covering them.

"Tell Chakwas that we got the Major coming in to the Med Bay and he's critically injured."

Kaidan's eyes stung as he slowly opened them. He saw two black figures surrounding him, and felt someone trying to get his pulse. Another hand was pressing on his leg wound. He couldn't hear what they were saying, his ears wouldn't stop ringing. He felt something wet drip down his forehead. He tried to move but Kaidan couldn't move at all, his body hurt too much.

"Kaidan" the muffled voice who was getting his pulse asked out loud. "Can you hear me?"

"Ugh" he grunted as took a sharp breathe in. His lungs felt as they were on fire as he struggled to breathe.

"Where's that stretcher! The majors hurt badly" another voice said. The voices began to get less clear and more distanced. He squinted his eyes trying to get the world to stop spinning.

"Stay with us Kaidan" the first voice said

He tried to say something, but coughed up some blood; wheezing as he continued to struggle to breathe.

"We're losing him"

The figures around him started to disappear.

"Kay" his raspy voice called out before he was surrounded by darkness.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Bioware owns all but I've played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass Effect 1-3**

***Also thank you for the feedback guys! I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

*******This has been reedited and has some ideas from the extended DLC.**

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Kaidan slowly opened his eyes as they adjusted to the sunlight that fell onto his face. He looked around and realized he was in bed in a hospital room. He looked down and saw his leg in a cast, his left arm was up in a sling and his chest was bandaged up. He couldn't remember how he got here. He then noticed he wasn't alone in the room and saw a doctor looking at a chart at the end of his bed.

"Good to see you're up Major." the doctor smiled "My names Doctor Hart and you're in London General Hospital right now. How are you feeling?"

"I've been better." Kaidan groaned as he tried to sit up but Doctor Hart rushed beside him to stop him.

"Hey I know your eager to get up but you had a collapsed lung, multiple broken bones, and your amp was fried." the doctor said she helped Kaidan lay back down "You won't be able to sit up for a few days."

"How did I get here?" Kaidan asked as he grabbed his head as he tried to remember what happened. He remembered they were running to the conduit, but his head hurt so much he couldn't think.

"You were dropped here by the Normandy; your injuries were too severe to treat on board so they brought you here before they had to leave on the Admiral's orders."

Kaidan then remembered what happened. He was running towards Shepard after she had called in Joker to evacuate them out of there. She was running towards the conduit, and he had gone after her. But his legs had given up and that's when he fell.

"_Oh no!" thought Kaidan_

"Where is she?" Kaidan blurted out at the Doctor "Where's Kay!"

"Where's who?" Doctor Hart asked

"Shepard, where is she?" Kaidan said as he started to get agitated "Is she okay? I need to see her right now!" Kaidan said as he started to get out of bed, but his body screamed at him to get back in.

"_No I can't leave her alone, not by herself again." _he thought as he struggled to get out of bed.

"Major your dressings will reopen, you have to sit down!" Dr. Hart demanded as she tried to restrain him.

"I don't care I need to see her right now!" said Kaidan as he pulled out an IV line from his arm.

"I need some help in here!" yelled Doctor Hart, as she struggled to restrain Kaidan. Two male nurses ran in to help her.

"Sir you have to calm down." one of them said as he held down Kaidan

"Why won't you tell me where she is!" Kaidan shouted "What happened?"

"First I need you to calm down." the male nurse said

Kaidan fell back onto his pillow; his body was exhausted from struggling with the nurse; it just collapsed.

"You don't understand I have to see her, I just need to know if she's okay." Kaidan panted looking at the nurses and Doctor Hart.

"Major I understand you want to check in on the commander but you just came out of surgery 2 hours ago; you have to stay in bed. When they brought you in your injuries were so serious if you hadn't made it when you did you could have died." Dr. Hart said, with a serious look on her face.

Kaidan looked at her with pleading eyes" Please I just have to know if she's okay, that's all."

Doctor Hart's facial expression changed and she looked at Kaidan sympathetically "Okay only if you promise me you won't try to get out of bed again, I'll tell you about Commander Shepard's condition"

"I promise doc" he sighed with relief.

The 2 male nurses looked at each other, neither of them looking Kaidan in the eyes.

After the reapers had collapsed, the aid for the casualties began. Everyone had been looking for Commander Shepard. Alliance Command had let them know that she had made it onto the citadel but they had lost contact with her com suit. They didn't know where in the citadel she could have been. That didn't stop hundreds of thousands of soldiers from helping, all of them from various alien races. Everyone knew the reapers wouldn't have been defeated if it hadn't been for Commander Shepard. Everyone wanted constant reports, wanting to know if the commander had been found. Then 18 hours after the war with the reapers was over, they had found her, barely clinging to life.

When Kaidan noticed that both nurses weren't making eye contact with him he started to panic

"What, what's wrong?" Kaidan panicked "Why are you looking at each other like that!"

Doctor Hart walked over to Kaidan's bedside and put her hand on his arm.

"They found her 18 hours ago, 12 hours after you were brought in" She said slowly, letting Kaidan absorb the information "She just got out of surgery 15 minutes ago, she's in the recovery room." then her eyes refused to meet his."They found her after 12 hours of being trapped under some concrete debris. She lost a lot of blood; she barely had a pulse when they brought her in."

"Oh god!" Kaidan said out loud as he felt tears coming to his eyes.

Kaidan looked away from the hospital staff, making sure they didn't see the tears that fell on his face. He closed his eyes. She was trapped there for 12 hours. All by herself, and he wasn't there for her. He had promised her that after the war was over he would never leave her side, that after what happened on horizon and how she had to deal with the collectors without him, he would never leave her.

The Nurses and Doctor Hart looked at Kaidan not knowing what to say as the man sat there in his thoughts.

Kaidan couldn't imagine the extent of her injuries if she was in surgery for that long.

He wiped his tears and turned his head. He looked up at the doctor, barely able to get his voice out.

"I want to be there when she wakes up." he finally announced after a 10 minutes of silence.

"I don't know if you can sir..." started Doctor Hart "Only family is allowed in her room."

"She doesn't have any family," Kaidan said as he looked up at the Nurses and Doctor Hart, "I'm the only family she really has."

"Umm, I'm sorry?" a confused Doctor Hart said "Her profile stated that she doesn't have any family."

"Yes officially she doesn't." a voice called out behind them.

Kaidan looked over and in rolled Admiral David Anderson on a wheelchair.

Kaidan struggled to get up and salute the man. He grunted when he remembered he wasn't suppose to, his body made sure he knew that.

"At ease soldier, take it easy." Anderson said as he wheeled over to Kaidan's bedside

"Aye aye sir" Kaidan grunted. "It's great to see you, I'm glad that you made it through with us sir"

"Me too Major, Me too." Anderson grinned at Kaidan.

Anderson then looked over at Doctor Hart and the Nurses.

"Could you give us some privacy?"

"Yes sir." Doctor Hart and the nurses said as they left the room.

Anderson waited until the door was closed

"It's good to see you up son." Anderson said as he smiled at Kaidan

"We lost some damn good soldiers but I'm glad you and Shepard made it through." Anderson said as a solemn look went over his face.

Kaidan nodded his head, "They sacrificed their lives so the galaxy would go on, and for that they will never be forgotten."

"They won't, we'll make sure of it." Anderson said in a determined voice. He paused and looked out the window at war torn London.

Kaidan didn't say anything to the man while he sat there in his thoughts; after all, the Admiral was born here.

Anderson sighed, "But that's not why I'm here, I'm here because of Shepard."

"I'm not sure if I understand sir" Kaidan said with a confused look on his face.

"I've known Shepard ever since she started her career in the Alliance." Anderson started, "Over the years; after all she's done for me and the rest of the galaxy, and I've come to see her as my own daughter."

Anderson sighed again and looked Kaidan in the eye.

"Son I have the authority to let you in Shepard's room but I need to know something." Anderson started "After her death I saw how you close you were to her. The way you reacted to her death, volunteering for every high risk op we had back then..."

"Kaidan I need to know for myself, should I be aware of anything going on between you two?" Anderson said with fatherly look on his face.

Kaidan wasn't entirely surprised his actions hadn't gone unnoticed. After Sovereign had hit the citadel, and he couldn't find Shepard, he panicked. Then he saw her limping towards them, he couldn't help but run up to her and embrace her in his arms. At that moment he didn't care who was watching.

Kaidan sighed and looked at his hands then at Anderson waiting for his reply. He took a deep breath in and looked up at him,"I love her Sir."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: ****Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3 **

**Thank you all for adding this story to your alerts, its very appreciated. **

**Ps. Listen to Mass Effect 3's soundtrack "I'm Proud Of You" when your reading this for full epicness and emotion!  
**

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Anderson smiled.

"I knew something was going on between you two, since after we defeated Sovereign. " Anderson said as he started to look out the window.

"I saw the way you embraced her after we found her limping out if that rubble. That and the first thing Shepard asked me when she came back was where you were."

Kaidan looked at Anderson with a blank face.

"If you knew, why didn't you say anything?"

Anderson turned away from the window and faced Kaidan.

"Because it wasn't up to me." sighed Anderson "I know how it feels to love someone that's also in the line of duty."

Kaidan looked at Anderson with a shocked expression.

"Wait you don't mean to say..."

"Yes major" Anderson said "I once had something like what you and Shepard have, and I let it slip away. Funny that we were reunited when the galaxy was on the brink of destruction"

"Yeah, really puts things into perspective." Kaidan chuckled

"hmmm sure does.." Anderson smiled "I first meet Kahlee Sanders when I was just a lieutenant."

_I first meet Shepard when I too was a lieutenant Kaidan thought_

Andersons face suddenly became grim,"She was the reason why I went on that mission with Saren. Ambassador Anita Goyle appealed to the Council to let me go with Saren on the rescue mission, to assess my Spectre candidacy."

Kaidan looked at the Admiral sympathetically. He remembered the conversation Shepard had with Anderson when they found out that the then Captain had History with Saren.

"I remember, you had Intel on a rouge scientist being funded by Battarian interests. He was trying to develop illegal AI on the verge. The Alliance had done the Intel report but the council had wanted a spectre on board, and you were assigned to help Saren in his investigation. You had tracked the scientists to a refining factory on Camala. The scientist was hidden away in the refinery surrounded by Battarian mercenaries. The plan was to sneak into the refinery, capture the scientists and sneak back out. Quick quiet and minimal bloodshed. Saren and you split up to cover more ground"

Anderson sighed, "That's not the whole truth, I spilt up so I could find Kaylee. I didn't know at that time that Saren had other interests in the artifact. Saren started to blow up the element zero refineries and all hell broke loose. He then put a damning report to the council blaming me for the whole thing and you know the rest of the story."

Kaidan sat there in silence. Anderson had lost the chance to be the first Human Spectre thanks to that report.

Anderson sighed again and looked down at his hands, "After that; we said our goodbyes, she was posted at a classified position, and I was devoted to my Military career."

Anderson looked up at Kaidan with a serious look on his face.

"Trust me I don't regret anything I've done in my career but the one thing that makes me question it sometimes is how lonely it can get by the end of the day."

"Kaidan, I was married and my marriage fell apart because I was never there for my wife." said Anderson, "Then I let it get in the way what I had for Kahlee Sanders. Don't let that happen to you and Shepard"

Kaidan was shocked hearing this from Anderson. Was he encouraging him and Shepard to continue a relationship despite regs?

"Sir" Kaidan started" Are you saying..."

"Son, the war is over." Anderson interrupted, "After what you two have gone through these last 3 years, you two deserve to be happy" he said with a sincere smile, "If you're worried about the regs, the Alliance would be insane to court martial the 2 heroes that helped destroy the reapers, if they do then don't worry I have your backs. Besides even though you and Shepard are Alliance; you two are also Spectres."

Kaidan smiled gratefully at the Admiral. "I don't know what to say sir.." he said humbly"Thank you."

"No need to thank me Kaidan, all I ask is that you take care of her." Anderson said seriously

"I will sir!" Kaidan smiled as he saluted Anderson.

Anderson smiled and saluted the Major back.

"Now we have a lot of injured soldiers and civilians out there, and it's causing a lot of rooms to be crowded." Anderson said as he started typing on a data pad.

Kaidan smirked, he knew where Anderson was going with this .

"Yes there are, it would be selfish for me to have this room to myself when there are others who can use it."

Anderson finished typing on his data pad and looked up at Kaidan " That's what I was thinking as well, I've just sent an order to to have you transferred to room 234, where you will be sharing it with Commander Shepard."smiled Anderson.

"I can't thank you enough sir." Kaidan said with a grateful smile.

Anderson nodded, "Don't thank me Kaidan, you helped save the galaxy again, it's the least I can do for you and Shepard" Anderson said as he started to wheel out the room.

Kaidan didn't know what else to say and just nodded as the admiral left the room.

A couple of minute's later 2 porters walked into the room.

"We're here to move you to room 234 Major." one of them said as he began to move the IV bag.

Kaidan just smiled._"Hold on Shepard I'm on my way"_

He then nodded to the porters as they started to move his bed out of the room and on the way to room 234.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: ****Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3 **

**If you like this story please leave a comment :)  
**

**"Me and You" belongs to Lifehouse not me. I adore the song though.  
**

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When they got to room 234, 2 guards were guarding the door.**  
**

The porters saw Kaidan looking over at the guards.

"Their here for her safety major, even though Cerberus is officially disbanded there are still some agents that might come after the Commander. Admiral Anderson put these men in charge of guarding her."

Kaidan nodded his head as the porters rolled him in.

"Sir also we were told to make sure you knew, again because of her safety'; she is listed as Jane Alenko officially."

Kaidan looked surprised,"_Must be Anderson's idea to use my name."_

"Uh thank you. " nodded Kaidan

The man saluted him, and lead Kaidan into room 234. As they rolled into the room, Kaidan noticed that the left side of the room was empty.

"Where's the Commander?" Kaidan said as they moved him in and set everything up.

"She's just got out of recovery but since it's crowded in there they decided to bring her in here sooner than expected. She should be here any minute now." the porter said as he set up Kaidan's bed and equipment.

Kaidan nodded and that very moment a porter stepped into the room with a bed behind him. Kaidan breath got taken away as he looked at the bed. Hooked up to numerous machines and IVs lay Commander Kaylie Shepard.

Kaidan felt his heart sink. Shepard looked so thin, and pale. She was covered in bandages all over her body. Her face was covered by smaller ones. Her forehead was also bandaged up, with her beautiful blonde hair peeking up. Both her legs and her right arm were in casts. She was hooked up to numerous machines, and had 2 IV bags dripping.

Kaidan felt tears beginning to form in his eyes. Seeing Shepard so fragile made his heart ache. This is how she must have felt when he was in the hospital after mars. He turned his head away so the porters wouldn't see the tears that were falling down his face.

Once the porters were done they left the room. Kaidan made sure the footsteps were gone, and turned his head back towards Shepard. At that very moment a doctor and nurse walked in.

"Kaidan?" the Grey haired woman spoke up.

"Doctor Chakwas?" Kaidan said with surprise "What are you doing here? " _Wait never mind that was a dumb question" Kaidan thought." She was Shepard's doctor, of course she would be here."_

"I'm in charge of the Commanders recovery. Since I worked with her when she went after the collectors, I know her cybernetics better than anyone else."

"I'm glad you're the one that's going to be treating her." Kaidan said as he gave her a grateful smile.

Doctor Chakwas smiled and gave Kaidan's hand a pat "I know this is hard for you, and I won't lie to you Kaidan.." Chakwas said as she got up and looked at the chart "Shepard's injuries are devastating, it's a miracle that she's even alive. I know this is going to be a shock to you, but in order to stabilize her we had to place her in a medically induced coma."

"What!" Kaidan choked out, he looked at Shepard and felt his heart break

"I'm sorry Kaidan, but it was the only way to stabilize her body and let it heal" Doctor Chakwas gently replied "That's why she was put on a respirator."

"She can't breathe on her own?" Kaidan barely got out.

"She can but it would be difficult for her, and with all her injuries it's too much for her body to handle right now. Once some of the injuries heal we'll take her off the respirator"

Kaidan nodded his head as tears formed in his eyes again."It's a lot to take in."

"I know Kaidan"

"If you need anything let me know okay?" she said softly.

"Doctor Chakwas, I just have one request, could you move my bed closer to hers, I want to be there for her." he said as his eyes were glued to Shepard.

"Of course Kaidan" she smiled, "After this war, everyone deserves to be with someone they care about."

Kaidan nodded his head. His friends from the first Normandy all knew what was going on between them; after Shepard's death it had became obvious. Then when the alliance had temporarily relieved him from active duty; after all the high risk ops he kept signing up from. Doctor Chakwas was called in to give him a Psychiatric evaluation. It was then when he had told her everything about him and Shepard. How a part of him died with her and he couldn't move on without her. She helped show him that Shepard wouldn't have wanted this. She would want him to live and fight against the reapers; finish the fight that she died trying to finish. He spent those 2 years, every Monday, at hour long sessions with Doctor Chakwas. When he was put back on active duty, he had thanked her for everything she had done, and that was the last time he had seen her. He later found out she had taken a leave of absence and had disappeared. Kaidan had wondered back then why Doctor Chakwas had taken a leave and was going to look into it, but he was assigned to Horizon and couldn't find out what had happened to her. That was until he ran into Shepard when the collectors came.

"Thank you for everything Doctor Chakwas" Kaidan said softly, "Especially for being there Shepard when she was alone." Kaidan smiled gratefully at Doctor Chakwas.

"Of course, Commander Shepard has become one of my closest friends" Doctor Chakwas said as she moved Kaidan's bed next to Shepard's.

Kaidan nodded his head as the doctor went over by the end of Shepard's bed to record her stats. She quickly wrote them down and left the room.

Kaidan looked over at Shepard's bed. It hurt to see her like this. Kaylie Shepard was always so strong. He remembered when even though Shepard was injured after a piece of sovereign had fallen on her, she refused to sit in the hospital while she said she could be helping rebuild.

He reached out his right hand and joined her left hand.

"Hey Kay, I don't know if you can hear me.."Kaidan spoke softly "But you can't leave me, not after all we been through. Not after what happened when you died with the first Normandy." he felt his eyes starting to water up,"Waking up and not knowing what happened to you, is the worst feeling in the world."

"Kay...you have to pull through this "he said as he squeezed her hand "Remember the promise you made me, that after all this was over; we would be together forever."

He looked at her hand and smiled, "That this symbolized that we would be joined forever." Kaidan glanced down at her hand as he caressed her ring,"You promised me, white dress and all."

Kaidan remembered the last song that he and Shepard listened to; that wonderful night.

"There's something about you now

I can't quite figure out  
Everything she does is beautiful  
Everything she does is right

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do  
Nothing to lose  
And it's you and me and all other people  
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you  
and me and all other people with nothing to do  
Nothing to prove  
And it's you and me and all other people  
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?  
And in what month?  
This clock never seemed so alive" He finished saying as he held her hand.

"Sorry I can't sing Kay." he chuckled, "Remember how you said this is our song" Kaidan looked down at her ring.

"I guess dad was right; this ring is lucky, it kept you safe" he said softly as he continued to caress her hand.

"Kay I love you so much." He could feel the tears running down his face.

"We thought that it might have been the end, but look what happened Kay, we won!" he smiled as tears continued to roll down" We finally won; it's all over." he whispered , as he kissed her hand. "All this happened because of you, if it wasn't for your will and determination; we all would have been massacred by the reapers!"

Kaidan looked over at the readings on the monitor.

"Now it's your turn" he said with determination" You rescued the galaxy and now it's time to fight for yourself" he stated with passion "You always have been a fighter Kay; a survivor. You died when the Normandy SR1 went down and you came back. You went through the Omega 4 relay and came back!"

"Just come back to me baby," he cried softly squeezing her hand again, "I won't ever leave your side again."


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: ****Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3 **

**If you like this story please leave a Review =)**

* * *

Kaidan opened his eyes. He quickly looked over to his right. He sighed with relief, she was still there. He looked down, his hand still holding hers from last night.

"Morning sunshine." he whispered as he kissed her hand. He was scared that yesterday had all been a dream but seeing her next to him reminded him that she was alive, and it wasn't a dream.

"Kaidan?" a voice called out.

Kaidan turned his head and looked towards the door where a woman silently came in.

"Mom?" Kaidan said in surprised voice

"Oh honey I'm so glad your okay!" Diana Alenko said as she rushed to her sons side. Her dark blonde hair had more Greys then the last time Kaidan had seen her; the day before the reapers attacked earth. He had stopped by his parent's home by English bay in Vancouver before reporting in at alliance headquarters.

"It's so good to see you mom." Kaidan smiled as his mom grabbed his head and pulled him into a hug.

"Kaidan I thought I lost you!" his mother whispered as she kissed her sons forehead.

"When I heard reports of some biotic's that were confirmed to be killed in action my heart stopped." she looked at his injuries with tears in her eyes,"My baby boy, I'm so glad that I found you and your safe."

Kaidan's heart sank as his mother had talked about some biotic's that were killed in action. What if some of them were his students? He would have to look into it later on.

"I'm glad you're here to mom." Kaidan smiled, "How did you find me?"

"After the reapers went down, I came looking for you in London. I looked everywhere at every hospital. When I came across this one, Admiral Anderson had heard me asking a solider about you. He told me you where in this hospital. He remembered me from the funeral, and showed me to your room." she smiled as she let her hand rest on her son's forehead.

"I was however asked for ID by the guards when I came here though, and searched as well. Jane Alenko is a very important person" she smiled as she looked over at Shepard.

Kaidan felt his cheeks turn red. He had talked to his mother about Shepard before but had never gotten around to telling her the truth, but he had a feeling she had known all along. After her death on the Normandy sr1, she had come to the funeral. She saw how numb he had gotten during the ceremony and watched him the whole time. At the end she had asked him about his relationship with his commanding officer.

Diana Alenko saw the raw emotion in her son's eyes as he looked up and that was all she had to know. She didn't ask him any more questions, and he just nodded and walked away. She didn't see him for the next two years after. He emailed once and a while but that was it.

Then suddenly when Commander Shepard had returned from the dead, his emails started to become more frequent. Then he finally managed to stop by the day before the reapers attacked. He looked alive. That's how she would describe it. He looked full of life and that life had returned back to his eyes. The same ones he had gotten from his father. He even laughed again. It was music to her ears. The morning of when he was suppose to leave, she had made him his favorite breakfast that he loved since he was a little kid; chocolate chip pancakes with whipped cream and homemade maple syrup.

After they had eaten, they said their goodbyes. Before he had left his mother stopped him. She placed a ring in his hand and he looked up at her surprised. She explained to him that his father had given her this ring when he purposed to her. She told him that it was a lucky ring. He remembered the stories his parents had told him when he was a kid, and just nodded his hugged his parents goodbye and headed to Alliance headquarters.

"Umm it was Anderson's idea." Kaidan said as he stared at Shepard lovingly.

"Kaidan Alenko, I think it's about time you told your mother the truth..." she grabbed a chair and sat between her son and Shepard.

"Mom I think we both know you know." Kaidan grinned at his mother.

"Maybe I do Kaidan but I want to hear it from you." she said carefully as she patted his knee.

"I...I love her" Kaidan said as he grabbed Shepard's hand and squeezed it.

"I'm in love with Commander Kaylie Shepard!"

Diana Alenko Smiled.

"I knew it the moment I saw your face during her funeral" said Diana Alenko as she gave her son a knowing glance."I'm your mother"

Kaidan smiled "I'm that obvious huh"

"Ha-ha, uh huh to me you are "She laughed.

Then Kaidan saw his mother's expression turn into a more serious one. She looked over him and examined his injuries.

"How are you doing Kaidan?" she asked softy.

Kaidan could see that she hadn't slept in a while.

"I'm doing okay mom, I had a collapsed lung, multiple broken bones," he started, "and my amp was fried when they found me."

She started to feel her eyes start to water. "I'm so sorry honey, I'm sorry I wasn't here for you sooner"

"Hey hey" Kaidan tried to comfort his mother, "You got here as fast as you could, hell you went all over London looking for me, and your here now mom that's what matters."

His mom nodded her head and as she patted his hand again her gaze suddenly became distant.

"He's still missing Kaidan; they don't know what happened to him."

Kaidan Looked up at his mom, and saw tears falling down her face. He took his hand and wiped her tears.

"He's fine mom, Dad's a Marine too he'll be fine." he said as he tried to convince himself, trying to put up a brave front for his mom.

She nodded her head as she fiddled with her heart locket. Kaidan Remembered giving it to her for mother's day a week before he joined the Alliance. It had a picture of them together as a family.

"I'm sorry to be doing this to you honey" she said as she looked over at Shepard" I know you going through a hard time as while"

Kaidan joined his hand with Shepard's again. "

It's okay Mom, I'm really glad you're here. We'll find dad don't worry."

She nodded her head, as she glanced at their joined hands.

"I'm glad you took my hint!" she smiled as she put her hand on top of theirs. "I'm so happy for both of you."

"Thank you for giving it to me before I left, " Kaidan smiled At his mother," It kept her safe"

She smiled as some tears came back to her eyes.

"How is she?" she said as she tried to wipe away the tears.

" She's in a medically induced coma, her body's 40% burned, she has multiple broken bones, and she's on a respirator..." Kaidan replied softly , he looked up at his mother, "I can't lose her again mom, I just can't!"

Diana Alenko got up and hugged her son.

" You won't honey she's a fighter." she looked at her son and wiped away his tears. "She's going to be okay"

Kaidan nodded his head as he hugged his mother.

"Be strong for her Kaidan, She needs you now more than ever."

Kaidan slowly fell back into his bed.

"Thanks mom."

Diana smiled "Of course Honey, now that I found you, I'll be here for you whenever you need me."

"How are you doing this morning Kaidan?" a voice interrupted

Kaidan turned around and saw Doctor Chakwas walking into the room.

"Oh hi Doctor Chakwas, I'm doing okay" he said as he tried to sit up straighter

"This is my mother, Diana Alenko, Mom, this is Doctor Chakwas , she's Shepard's Doctor."

"Technically yours as well Kaidan." Chakwas chuckled, "Nice to meet you." Chakwas said as she shook Kaidan's Mothers hand.

"Same here Doctor." Diana Alenko replied "Thank you for taking care of my son, and my future daughter in law."

Doctor Chakwas smiled and looked over at Kaidan, "I knew that was a ring I saw on her finger."

Kaidan turned red again and tried to say something, "Uh... I'm sorry I didn't say anything yesterday..."

"You don't owe me an explanation Kaidan." Chakwas interrupted, "It's about time, I'm really happy for you two!" She smiled as she went over to Shepard's bedside and recorded the stats on her monitors.

"Uh umm thank you." Kaidan smiled back.

Diana laughed as she saw her son squirm."I take it you two hadn't told anyone yet?"

Kaidan sighed "There was so much going on; we didn't have the time too."

Diana smiled "I was just teasing, now are going to tell me how you proposed or what?"

Kaidan sat there with a smile on his face as he remembered when he purposed to Kaylie Shepard.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: ****Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3 **

******"You and Me" belongs to Lifehouse, I just adore that song.  
**

**Hey guys! I know its been a while but I have a good reason. This chapter is much longer then the previous and is rated M so the rating for the story will be bumped. Ive had extra time to work on it and really love the way it turned out! So hopefully you enjoy it, and if you do please leave a review=)I worked hard on this chapter and would really appreciate it =)  
**

** are alot of references to previous chapters (like little things) lets see if you can spot it ;)  
**

* * *

They did it, they finally did it. Cerberus was no more. All that remained of the organization was probably a couple of groups of agents scattered out in the galaxy. But with the illusive man gone and no longer able to contact them, it was over. Kaidan looked over at Shepard as the shuttle neared the Normandy. He knew something wasn't right. She wouldn't look him in the eye; instead she kept staring out into space. All he wanted to do was to go up to her and embrace her. To tell her to let it all out but with EDI, James and Garrus around he knew she wouldn't let her "Commander" front down.

The shuttle landed inside the Normandy shuttle bay and the hatch flew open. Shepard quickly dashed out the door and ran straight into the elevator. Kaidan ran after, calling her but she wouldn't turn around or stop. The elevator came and Shepard quickly stepped in and punched the lift button.

"Shepard!" Kaidan yelled as the door closed in his face. He hit the lift button repeatedly, but the elevator didn't come back down. "_She's probably headed towards her quarter's"_Kaidan thought. Garrus ran up to Kaidan.

"What the hell happened Kaidan" he asked a bit winded, "I was talking to Cortez about how the shuttles guns need to be calibrated before we hit earth, but then I heard you yelling; what happened ?"

Kaidan smacked the lift button again and turned to Garrus. "It's Shepard she just stormed out of the shuttle and went straight to her quarters"

Garrus's mandibles twitched "Oh it has to do with what we saw at the base doesn't it"

Kaidan nodded his head and kicked the elevator door "Damn it why is it taking so long"

Finally the door opened and Kaidan stepped in.

"Hey Kaidan, just take of her "Garrus called out carefully "If there's anyone who can talk to her right now it's you"

"Thanks Garrus"

Kaidan sighed as the doors closed. He remembered how Shepard had told him that Garrus was like the brother she never had. The Turian had been there for her when Kaidan couldn't. He remembered the conversation he had with Garrus in Vancouver when Shepard was incarcerated

...

_"Kaidan" a voice barked_

_Kaidan excused himself from the private he was talking to and turned around._

_There stood a Turian whose mandibles were twitching like no tomorrow._

_"Garrus?" asked Kaidan "What are you doing here"_

_"Visiting Shepard, why else would I be here" the Turian said with clenched teeth "But that's not why I'm here taking to you, look I know you been seeing Shepard at her room every day since she's been in here"_

"_I have" Kaidan answered warily not knowing were the Turian was going with this._

_"Why" Garrus grunted_

_"I don't think that's any of your business" Kaidan crossed his arms._

_" It is if it's dealing with my best friend who's like a sister to me "Garrus spat " Do you even know how she dealt with horizon?"_

_"I know I messed on horizon " Kaidan started to get angry" I'm trying to make up for that"_

_"Huh yeah right" Garrus laughed sarcastically "Is that what your really doing, or are you still making sure She's not with Cerberus " Garrus replied angrily_

_"Just stop it Garrus" Kaidan spat back" Yeah, I was angry on horizon but we're trying to get past that"_

_"After what you did to her on Horizon? You nearly destroyed her" the Turian yelled as he came face to face with Kaidan_

_"Don't you think I know that" Kaidan yelled " I hurt the woman I love more than anything in the Galaxy, and she almost had a nervous breakdown because of me!" Kaidan felt his bionic's flaring. "If I could do anything, I would give to have those precious moments with her back"_

_"Love?" Garrus asked quietly_

_"Yes love" Kaidan let out a frustrated sigh, and his biotic's relaxed " I love her Garrus" He looked at Garrus "What I did to her was unforgiveable. When I found out she was put under house arrest here in Vancouver, I came as fast as I could"_

_Kaidan gripped his forehead as he felt a migraine coming on" I didn't mean to hurt her Garrus; I wasn't thinking when I said those things to her"_

_"I was just so hurt .For two years, I mourned her death, then suddenly I was hearing all these rumors that she's alive and with Cerberus of all people!" Kaidan walked out into the courtyard and leaned against the ledge as he looked out at Canada Place in the distance._

_"Then on Horizon seeing her alive, I just couldn't believe my eyes. On the one side I was so happy, so I ran up to hug her and I didn't want to let go of her" He closed his eyes as he remembered how it felt to touch Shepard after thinking he would never see her again. He opened his eyes and turned around facing Garrus. "Then I got angry, that those rumors were true. That she really was with Cerberus."_

_"I thought she had really started to Believe in what Cerberus stood for"_

_"She just used them to get to the collectors " sighed Garrus "She went to the Alliance first, hell even the Council but they all refused to help her."_

_"Yeah I know that now. After taking to Shepard these last few days, I know she's still the woman I fell in love with" sighed Kaidan as he looked at the Turian " I hate myself for what I did to her on horizon; you have to know that Garrus"_

_Garrus looked at Kaidan, mandibles twitching. He uncrossed his arms." You damn right better be" he said as hit Kaidan's shoulder with his as he started to walk away "Or next time it won't be a conversation were having"_

_Kaidan nodded his head" I won't Garrus" he called out as the Turian walked out of the door._

...

After what seemed like forever, the elevator doors opened to her Quarters deck. Kaidan rushed out and saw that her room door was locked.

"Kay, let me in" he banged the door, he didn't Get a response. He started to panic "Kay you better open this door right now "There was still no response.

"EDI!" Kaidan shout "Shepard's not opening her door, could you overload the lock?"

"Yes major " EDI stated as she stated to type away

" Shepard locked herself in her room" Joker asked out loud" what the hell happened?"

" She saw the Lazarus project files at the base" EDI said quietly

"Oh, but Shepard's already seen them, I mean showed them to her" Joker stated as he gave EDI a look.

"Jeff, those files were never meant for Shepard to see"

Joker's eyes widened "Holy Shit"

"There" EDI finished typing "The door should open now major"

" Thank you EDI "

Kaidan sighed as he rushed into Shepard's room. He looked around the room and didn't see Shepard. He ran into the washroom. He sighed with relief as he entered the washroom. There she was, standing in nothing but her bra and panties, staring into the mirror,

" Shepard" Kaidan spoke softly as he slowly walked up to her . She didn't respond and kept staring straight at the mirror.

"Kay" he called out softly as he touched her shoulder. She flinched at his touch and turned around facing him with tears streaming down her face.

"Kaidan" she asked as her lips trembled "Am I really Kaylie Shepard"

Kaidan instantly grabbed her into his embrace. He kissed her forehead and placed his chin on top of her head.

"Of course you are Kay."

He felt her sobbing onto his chest. He tightened his arms around her.

"You are the Commander Kaylie Shepard. The very Commander who saved the Galaxy from Sovereign, who then stopped the Collectors from taking any more Human Colonies, the same one that just destroyed the Cerberus base, and the same one that's human, not a VI Kay"

" How can you be so sure "she cried as she looked up at him.

Kaidan cupped her face with his hands. His hands reached up and delicately traced the scar above her right eyebrow with his fingers."VI's don't have scars "

"So, they could be scarring from the cybernetics; from all that skin they needed to build another Shepard" she spoke quietly

He reached Down and slowly brushed her chest with his hand. He slowly placed his hand on her chest as he felt her heart beat against his hand.

" VI's don't have hearts that beat"

"For all we know it's a mechanical heart"

His hand Reached up and he tilted her chin so she was facing him. He looked deeply into her eyes

"No VI could ever replicate those beautiful baby blue eyes that I fell in love with."

A tear fell down Shepard's face. "I ugh " Before she could finish her sentence, Kaidan leaned in and kissed her.

It started off softly and grew more passionate. His tongue swiftly swept across her lips before parting them slowly. His tongue explored her velvety mouth softly, while entwining her tongue with his. She moaned as her tongue meet his.

Coming out for air, Kaidan slowly pulled back.

"VI's don't feel alive like that" he said as he placed his forehead against hers.

She looked up at him

"Make me feel alive" she whispered closing her eyes

Kaidan pulled back and started to take the armor off that he had forgotten about. He then faced Shepard with his under armor shirt and shorts.

She lifted his shirt over his head and threw it on the floor. Kaidan leaned in and kissed her. His lips came crashing down on hers. His lips consuming hers, giving into to their love and desire for each other. Shepard backed up into the shower, both lost in each other as his mouth explored hers. She let out a moan as the kiss became more passionate. Kaidan reached around and unclasped her bra and threw it across the bathroom. He stepped back as he admired Shepard. His hands slowly brushing her breasts, Shepard closed her eyes and let her head fall back. He slowly cupped her breasts, caressing and teasing her nipples. He looked up and saw her baby blues darken; the lust burning through.

Not taking his eyes off her, he slowly backed Shepard up against the wall accidentally turning on the shower. She gasped as the water hit her aroused nipples.

She then saw that Kaidan still had his shorts on. She kneeled down and tugged his shorts off. Kaidan groaned as his aroused member sprang out and was hit by the water. Kaidan grabbed Shepard and kissed her again. Shepard moaned as she felt his member against her.

Kaidan quickly helped her get her panties off, and threw them on the floor with the rest.

"I love you Kaidan" She whispered with her arms wrapped around his neck

" I love you too key, you are real; No VI could ever replace you "

He slowly pushed her against the shower wall again. Looking at her the entire, time, Kaidan placed his member against her. She groaned, and closed her eyes as she felt his member throb against her lips. Kaidan took the hint, and slowly start to enter her. The moment it was in her she gasped out loud. He grunted as he felt her tighten around him.

He thrust the remainder of his member deep inside her.

"Kaidan" She moaned

Kaidan was lost in the lust as he continued thrusting inside her. He started off slow but as the sounds of her pleasure filled the room, it encouraged him to go at a faster rhythm. Before long the fast tempo of his length pushed her to her climax and she coated his member in a hot release. He continued thrusting into her with pleasure until he too couldn't take it anymore. He cried out loud as he felt his member release deep inside her.

She fell forward into his chest, his hands still around her waist. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. He tightened his embrace around her as they both panted and tried to catch their breath.

"I love you" she said as she her fingers traced his jaw line.

"I love you too Kay " he nuzzled her long graceful neck.

Kaidan sensed that with all that happened today, and their passionate love making; that Shepard was exhausted. He turned off the water and picked up Shepard in his arms. She wrapped her hands around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. He carried her over to the bed and placed her under the comforter. He soon joined her, and swept her into his arms.

He cuddled close to her as she moved closer to him.

" Thank you for snapping me out of it Kaidan " she spoke softly ,her hand stroked his , as it was draped over her stomach "What would I do without you"

"You never have to know" he kissed her temple " I will always be here, by your side "

"mmm" she said as she closed her eyes "I could lay here forever next to you "

"Forever and ever Kay" he whispered as he tucked her blonde hair behind her ear. He felt himself get lost in eyes.

She watched him as she continued to caress his hand "What are you thinking about Kaidan?"

Kaidan snapped out if it "Huh, Oh nothing, hey look I know you're tired why don't you take a nap and meet me in the observation deck in half an hour"

" Mmm sounds good she said as moved in the bed to get comfortable.

He kissed her forehead "I'll see you then, I love you" he slowly slipped out of the bed.

He tucked her in and went to grab his clothes off the bathroom floor. He quickly changed back into under armor shorts and shirt and grabbed his armor. As he left the room Kaidan turned around and looked back at Shepard, who had fallen asleep. He smiled

"I'll see you in 30 minutes my love."

The door closed behind him.

"EDI, please wake up the commander in 30 minutes and remind her to meet me in the observation deck"

"Alright, Major is that all?"

Kaidan thought for a moment "Actually no, there is something you could help me with ..."

There Kaidan thought "Everything is perfect"

"Major Alenko, Commander Shepard is up and on her way down."

"Good, thank you EDI " Kaidan smiled everything was coming together.

The doors opened and their stood Commander Shepard with her blonde hair open, in waves. She rarely let her hair open and down, and whenever she did, Kaidan felt his breathe get taken away.

_"God she looks beautiful" he thought  
_  
"Kaidan what's all this " Shepard gasped as she looked around the room.

The lights of the observation room were dimmed. There were candles placed all over the room. It was the candles and the stars glow that illuminated the room. From the door to the window, we're a path of rose petals. Down right in front of the window was a blanket and a bottle of Serrice brandy. Their song "You and me" was playing throughout the room.

Kaidan watched as Shepard took it all in. He swore he saw her eyes twinkle.

"It's so beautiful "she exclaimed

"Still not as beautiful as you Kay" Kaidan said as he walked up and reached for hand. Shepard smiled as she extended hers. He kissed it lightly.

He then took her arm under his and led her to the blanket.

"Where did you find all this" she asked as she sat down

" EDI said Kasumi had left it in one of the storage containers in engineering" Kaidan explained as he sat down next to her

"Of course she did " Shepard laughed

" I wanted to do something special for you before we enter the sol system "he looked into her eyes "Before this war ends, once and for all"

"Kaidan , that's so sweet " she said as she cupped his face with her hands "No one's ever done anything like this for me before"

"Kay, we know our odds about this war" he started as he caressed her hands " but I know we'll make it through"

He sighed " After all we been through this last 3 years, we can make it through anything "

He got up and looked deep into her eyes and got a box out Of his pocket.

" But just in case I got this"

Shepard's eyes fell on the box

"My dad said this kept my mom safe when she had gone to see my Aunt in Singapore" he looked at the ring adoringly "When she was making her way back, another transport shuttle crashed into the shuttle my mom was on"

"Wait wasn't she..."

"Yeah, you remembered" he grinned "She was pregnant with me when that transport shuttle went down"

"I never told you how horrible the crash was though. The cores had erupted in flames, and the smoke was so thick. When the Rescue teams had arrived, they couldn't see anything past the thick smoke"

"How did she get out?"

Kaidan smirked as he held up the ring "My dad said the Rescue team told him they don't know how but this ring; the sun reflected off it so brightly that, they found my mom. From that day on, my dad said this ring was lucky. It saved mine and my mom's lives"

He looked up at Shepard who stood there in shock. "My mom gave it to me before I left home in Vancouver. She said I would know what to do with it, and I do"

Kaidan got down on one knee. Shepard gasped as he did

"Kay, when this war is over, I want to be together with you forever"

Shepard looked down at Kaidan with tears in her eyes.

"This ring will help keep you safe during the battle, as we fight to retake earth"

"I promise, that I will never leave your side" Kaidan looked deep into Shepard's blue eyes

"Kaylie Shepard would you do the honor of marrying me, when this is all over"

Shepard looked into Kaidan's amber eyes. Those same eyes she swore she had fallen in love with the day she woke up in the Normandy Medical Bay after Eden Prime.

"Yes"

"Yes! Oh my god Kay "he grabbed her into a deep embrace as kissed her. Kaidan felt her tears rubbing up against his cheek, as his touched hers.

As they pulled apart Shepard put her head against Kaidan's

" I promise that at the end We will win, that when this is all over I'll be walking down the aisle towards you, wearing a white dress" Shepard cried as she kissed Kaidan again

"Kay you made me the happiest man in the galaxy, I love you"

"I love you too Kaidan "

They held on to each other until joker came on the com.

"Commander, Admiral Hackett's ship is approaching the Normandy"

Shepard sighed "Thanks joker I'll be there in a moment"

"Aye, Aye commander"

Kaidan laughed "Leave it to joker to always interrupt us at the most convenient times"

She smiled "Well he is joker"

She leaned in toward Kaidan and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

"I love you" she whispered in his ear, as her arms wrapped around him.

"I love you too" he smirked stroking her back "You should be heading up, before the Admiral arrives"

She sighed "I guess" as she slowly pulled away from Kaidan. As she started to walk out the door, she turned around.

"I promise" she said as she held up her ring, and with that she left the room.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3 **

**Hey guys so I'm uploading this on my birthday, so I hope you all appreciate it! If you like the story leave a Review ;)**

**Thanks for all adding this to your story alerts; it's very appreciated!**

*******This has been reedited and has some ideas from the extended DLC. Only chapters 1,2 and 7 have been edited to go with some ideas from the DLC.**  


* * *

Kaidan had finally convinced his mother to go get something eat. She had been in his and Shepard's room for hours, refusing to leave his side.

He sighed and looked over at Shepard. Doctor Chakwas had told him that there was little improvement, and Shepard still isn't able to breathe on her own. He knew it had only been a couple of days and it maybe be a few weeks or more before Shepard wakes up, but he couldn't help it. All he wanted was her to wake up and be okay.

His own injuries were getting better slowly. He still wasn't allowed to use his biotic's, not that he was complaining. His migraines had gotten worse, and that was all the encouragement he needed to not use his biotic's. Doctor Chakwas had told him that it was due to removing his amp and placing a new one. His rib cage was healing well, as well as his arm. He was lucky that his barrier had saved him.

"Jane Alenko, really Kaidan?" Joker grinned as he limped in.

"Joker!" he grinned "Well yeah it's to protect her identity."

"Yeah sure, it has nothing to do with that big ass grin on your face" Joker laughed as he sat in the chair that Kaidan's mom had been sitting in. He looked over at Shepard.

"How is she doing?" he frowned as he looked at all the machines attached to Shepard.

Kaidan sighed "She's not where the doctors want her to be but she's alive"

"No shit she's alive, it is Shepard after all" Joker smiled but then his smile faded as he looked back Kaidan.

"I didn't want to leave you guys behind you know."

Joker remembered 30 hours ago, Shepard had ordered him to do a pick up for a evac. Kaidan's injuries were so severe, that they had to drop him off at London General. They then rejoined the fleets but as the crucible was about to fire, Admiral Hackett had ordered the fleets to disengage and head to the rendezvous point. It was so hard for Joker to leave.

Kaidan looked at Joker sincerely.

"I know Joker. You would never willingly leave anyone behind."

"_Damn it it felt like the Normandy SR1 again." Joker thought_

Joker looked at Kaidan and shook his head.

"I'm sorry"

Kaidan gave joker a confused look" What are you apologizing for Joker? I said I know you wouldn't have left us behind willingly..."

"It's not just that I'm sorry for Kaidan, I'm also sorry for what happened to her on the SRI" he paused and looked sympathetically at Kaidan, "And I'm sorry for what you had to go through because she died trying to save me"

"Joker, even if you hadn't stayed on, she would have tried to save someone else. It's not your fault, but if it helps you, then I accept your apology"

"Thanks." Joker said sincerely. He glanced over at Shepard and noticed something shining at him.

"Wait, Kaidan you didn't" he exclaimed as reached for Shepard's hand and examined it, "You did! You sly bastard, when did you purpose to her?"

Kaidan smiled, "Uh it was when you interrupted us, right before Hackett came on board"

"What? I can't believe I didn't notice man I must have been off my game."Joker grinned as he shook his head.

"But all in reality Kaidan, I'm happy for you two. Watching you two apart from each other, it's hard to watch."

"Wow joker "Kaidan laughed, "Wouldn't think I see the day when you were going soft. Things must be going great for you and Edi."

"Yeah I guess they are" Joker smiled

Kaidan was happy for joker. But he still couldn't help but be a little jealous. EDI was fine; joker was fine.

"So...how are you doing Kaidan?" Joker asked

"Well, my injuries are slowly healing..."

"That's not what I meant Kaidan," Joker gave Kaidan a look "I mean how are you really doing? It must be hard watching Shepard like this."

Kaidan looked blankly at Joker. "I wish I could trade places with her..."

Joker looked with concern at Kaidan "Kaidan..."

"No, I really wish I could. She's gone through so much over the last 3 years and now this. If I could do anything it would be to trade places for her. I would do anything to see her up and talking. Joker she's in a medically induced coma..."

Joker opened his mouth to speak but interrupted by Kaidan.

"I know I have faith in her, I do! I mean Shepard's beaten the odds so many times. But there's that cynical bastard in the back of my head that thinks what if her lucks ran out. I don't know why I'm thinking like this. She will survive."

"Kaidan, she's going to be fine" Joker said, he was a little taken back at Kaidan's comment.

"I know, I just can't..." Kaidan clenched his head. He felt a migraine coming on.

"Whoa, Kaidan are you alright? I'm going to get Doctor Chakwas for you."

Joker quickly limped outside, and found Doctor Chakwas across the Hall"

"Doctor Chakwas, I think you should take a look at Kaidan."

"What is it Jeff?" Doctor Chakwas looked at Joker in concern as they both rushed back to Kaidan and Shepard's room.

"I don't know we were talking and then suddenly he stops talking and clutched his head. I think it's a migraine but I've never seen it this bad."

"Thank you for grabbing me Jeff, next time you can page me with the pager by Kaidan's pillow"

"Yeah I didn't see it sorry. But wait..." Joker said as he grabbed Doctor Chakwas shoulder as they reached the entrance of room 234. "Kaidan was not acting like his self...I mean he was being really paranoid and the things he said made me kind of concerned."

"What did he say Jeff?"

"He said he wished he could trade places with Shepard." Joker said quietly, "That it was unfair that she had to go through this again, and why couldn't it be him in the medically induced coma."

Doctor Chakwas eyebrows went up in surprise. Her face then became serious.

"Thank you for telling me Jeff, if you don't mind I'm going to examine Kaidan. Could you wait outside?"

"Yeah of course" Joker said as he took a chair that was outside in the hall and sat down.

Doctor Chakwas came into the room and saw Kaidan sitting in his bed clutching his head.

"Kaidan, what's wrong" She said as she went up to him. She grabbed titled his head up and took a light as she checked out his pupils.

"I don't know Doctor Chakwas, I was talking to Joker then I suddenly got this really bad migraine" he said as he clenched his teeth.

Doctor Chakwas then grabbed his chart. She looked through the medications the nurse had transcribed and stopped.

"Damn it..."

"What's wrong?" Kaidan said with concern

Doctor Chakwas sighed. "Kaidan the nurse transcribed Tylenol 3 in your medication record. You can't take Tylenol 3 because of your history with Depression. Even though you aren't taking the medication now, it still brings back those feelings and imbalances if you take Tylenol 3."

After the physiatric evaluation with Doctor Chakwas, Kaidan was given counselling. When counselling alone wasn't working, he was then prescribed anti depressants. He was taking them regularly until Horizon, when he saw Shepard. After Chakwas had joined with Shepard, Kaidan had been referred to Doctor Michel who continued his treatment. After Horizon, Doctor Michel had noticed a difference in Kaidan and they had decided to slowly ease Kaidan off the medication. A month later and Kaidan no longer was on anti depressants. It was also the time when he had started to get in contact with Shepard again.

"I don't know why she didn't notice this. I prescribed another pain medication that's known to work for people who have had history with depression. I'm sorry Kaidan. I'm going to have a chat with her right away."

"It's okay Doctor Chakwas. I'm sure it was a mistake."

Doctor Chakwas nodded "Yes, but she needs to be more careful, I'm going to request another nurse; someone I know to see to you and Shepard."

Kaidan nodded his head.

"I'll be right back with the medication I was talking about then get your migraine medication."

"Thanks Doctor Chakwas" Kaidan said out loud as the doctor quickly went out the room.

Joker slowly came back into the room.

"Hey Kaidan, feeling better?"

"No, but Chakwas went to get the medication so I should be soon."

Joker nodded his head as he sat down. Kaidan looked at him.

"I heard what you told Doctor Chakwas..."

"Kaidan...I was just concerned about you man."

"I know, and thanks for telling Doctor Chakwas. If you hadn't she wouldn't have noticed the medication error, before hand."

Joker gave a confused look at Kaidan, "Wait...they messed up one of your medications?"

Kaidan sighed, "Not entirely. Look Joker, I never told anyone else this; not even Shepard; with everything she had on her plate. After Shepard's death; I was put on anti depressants."

Joker eyes widened, "Kaidan...I..."

"It's okay Joker. I never told anyone because I was so angry. Especially at you and I'm sorry. You were like my best friend on the Normandy and I just shut you out."

"Hey... don't worry I understand why you did." Joker said softly, "I'm sorry for not being a better friend and actually being there for you."

"Yeah I guess we both are sorry. Best friends?" Kaidan smiled

"Hell yeah we are!" Joker laughed as he fist bumped Kaidan.

"So...can I be the best man at your guys wedding?" Joker grinned.

Kaidan smiled, "Of course...I wouldn't have it any other way."


	8. Chapter 8

******A/N:Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3**

**Thank you for all the reviews and adding this to your story alerts =)  
**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter and feel free to leave any feedback.**

* * *

"What's this I hear about a wedding?"

Joker and Kaidan looked over and saw Garrus leaning on the doorframe.

"Garrus, kind of creepy that you're standing there watching us..."

"Ha ha Joker very funny." Garrus said.

Garrus walked over to Kaidan's bedside. He looked over at Shepard's bed and placed his hand onto Kaidan's shoulder.

"I'm sorry I didn't try to find her...I know she saw me as a brother, and I failed her. She was all alone for all those hours."

"Garrus, it's not your fault. She wanted us to be safe, that's why she called Joker to get us out of there. I realize that now." He looked up at Garrus.

"I hate that she made us leave and headed to the Conduit herself, but now I realize that if I was in her shoes, I would have done the same thing. I would make sure she could get away just so she had a chance to survive. I understand that, I don't agree with her, but I understand where she was coming from."

Joker looked at Kaidan and smiled.

"I know your right." Garrus sighed. He looked at the machines hooked up the Shepard.

"I heard she's on life support..." He quietly let out.

Kaidan sadly nodded his head, "Her injuries are too severe right now that she can't breathe on her own without going into shock or cardiac arrest."

Garrus clenched his teeth. He looked over at Shepard. She looked so fragile. Shepard had become like a sister to him these few years. Thanks to her he didn't give into his hatred for Sidonis. After they had come back from the Citadel, Shepard had explained to him that he did the right thing. She showed him that if he had killed him; it wouldn't bring back the friends he lost. She told him she saw regret and torment in Sidonis's eyes and that he was living in his own personal hell already. She was right. If he had done it, he would be a different person.

"She'll pull through it Kaidan, she always does."

Kaidan looked up gratefully at Garrus.

"I know, thank you. I just want her to wake up and for all this uncertainty to be over."

"Yeah me too..." Garrus sighed. "Sorry it took us so long to get here, after the crucible fired, Admiral Hackett ordered all fleets to pull out and meet at the rendezvous point. When the blast happened we narrowly escaped before the sol mass relay got damaged and we ended up on Zorya somehow..." Garrus looked at joker as he finished his sentence.

"Hey! I'm sorry I didn't have time to pick out a better planet for you Garrus" Joker said sarcastically, "I was too busy trying not to get the Normandy blown up to notice!"

" I know but why Zorya? It's 2 systems from Sol." Garrus sneered.

"I just choose a random spot! I didn't really get a choice to see what planet would be best to crash land on! All I knew was if I hesitated even a minute, we could have been blown up with the blast. Were lucky the Normandy only sustained few damages and it only took 2 days to repair."

Garrus just nodded his head and ended the discussion right then and there.

"Wait...what happened to the mass relays?"Kaidan asked with a confused look.

"Oh right you don't know " Joker said as he brought up his Omni tool. He showed Kaidan the video of the damaged mass relay.

"Like Garrus said the crucible was powerful enough to stop the reapers but it also damaged the citadel and the mass relays, as it sent out that massive beam throughout the galaxy, getting each reaper in every system."

"Then how did you guys get back from the system Zorya was in 30 hours?"

"The Mass relays were damaged not destroyed. All the fleet's scientists tested the Mass Relays before some ships went back to their home worlds. They found out that the damage that was done to the relays was that they could only propel the ships shorter distances, which only slows down travel time by 3-5 hours. It's also advised to let only letting 2-3 ships go through the Mass Relays at a time until they all can be fixed. Sol's mass relay was partially fixed but some Mass relays in the galaxy aren't responding, leading the scientists to believe that they are more damaged then the rest."Joker said as he closed his omni tool.

"Wow" Kaidan said as looked up at the ceiling. "A lot happens when you're in the hospital on pain killers and sleeping most of the time."

"Yeah it does." Joker laughed.

Garrus smiled "A lot can happen when the Galaxy works together as one, and it's all because of Shepard."

Kaidan looked over at Shepard.

"She spent all these months preparing for that battle, and once she gets out of that coma she can finally rest."

Garrus and Joker nodded their heads in agreement.

Doctor Chakwas walked into the room, with a stern look on her face.

"I'm sorry but could you excuse us Garrus; Jeff. I have to talk to Kaidan about something in private."

"Yeah of course, we'll be in the Cafeteria if you need us Kaidan." Garrus said as he walked out with Joker.

Once they left the room Doctor Chakwas took out Shepard's chart and come over to Kaidan's bedside.

"Kaidan, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this earlier..." Doctor Chakwas started.

"Tell me what earlier?" Kaidan asked as he looked over at Shepard concerned. "What are you talking about Doctor Chakwas?"

"When Shepard was bought in, and after we had taken care of immediate injuries; we started to begin tests for brain activity..."

"Wait" Kaidan said as he slowly looked up at Chakwas "You...you didn't think she could have brain damage did you?"

"There was a possibility. When we found her, she had a severe head injury. We had to do some tests to make sure that there wasn't any brain damage from the trauma."

Kaidan sat in his bed, frozen.

"Why didn't you tell me that day Doctor Chakwas..."Kaidan said angrily, "Why wouldn't you tell me something this important!"

"Kaidan you had gone under major surgery. You were already were under great stress from learning Shepard's condition, this could have tipped you over the edge."

"Still, it doesn't excuse the fact that you didn't tell me. I'm her fiancé for god sakes."

"I know, I'm sorry Kaidan but as your Doctor I had to do what was best for you, and at that time not telling you was what was best for you.

Kaidan face softened. He was still mad but he had to know what was really going on. Getting angry with Chakwas wasn't going to help.

"What's going on with her ?"

took out the scans from the folder in her hands.

"We scanned Shepard's brain the minute she came in when we found her. On the CT we found something that no one that is on her case has ever seen. "

Doctor Chakwas showed Kaidan the scan.

"Do you see the dark spots in around some of the parts of her brain? That isn't normal Kaidan."

Kaidan looked at the scan, then up to Chakwas with a blank face.

"What does this mean?" He barely got out.

"We don't know Kaidan. Right now we can only assume that it's not good."

Doctor Chakwas picked up another scan and showed Kaidan.

"In this scan, it shows the dark spots starting to disappear, but in its place, there appears to be some damage."

"Wait, you mean these parts that are gray are the damage done to her brain?"

"I'm afraid so."

Kaidan felt tears stinging in his eyes. He felt his body go numb as Doctor Chakwas words about the brain damage rang in his ears.

"Then why don't you do anything to fix it!" He cried out.

"We don't know how Kaidan. The only person, who knows how, is on her way."

"Who would that be?"

Doctor Chakwas was about to answer Kaidan's question when the solider guarding their room stepped in.

"Doctor Chakwas, Miranda Lawson has arrived. She'll be up here in 20 minutes."

Doctor Chakwas nodded her head. "Thank you."

The soldier nodded his head as he saluted Chakwas and went back to his position.

Kaidan looked at Doctor Chakwas.

"You called Miranda?"

"Yes I did, Kaidan. She reversed the damage done to Shepard's brain when she brought her back with the Lazarus project. She's the only one who knows how to repair the damage done.

"Why didn't you call her as soon as the scans came in?"

"With everything happening after the war, it was hard to find her and make contact with her. We finally managed to get through yesterday. She was with her sister and she said she would be here as soon as she could."

Kaidan sat in his own thoughts as he tried to register everything Chakwas said. He combed through his hair with his hands in frustration.

"Kaidan, I know this is hard for you..."

"No you don't know how hard it is. How hard it is to have the person you love more than anything in the world be right next to you and but not really be there at all?" Kaidan said as he shut his eyes feeling a migraine coming on.

"I know I sound like a broken record but it's just so damn hard." Kaidan said as tears started flowing.

"There hasn't been any progress about her getting better. Just that her condition is the same. It's so frustrating."

"I'm sorry; I wish I had better news for you Kaidan I really do... I wish that Shepard wasn't here that she was awake and you two were off somewhere off being happy."

"I need to clear my head..." Kaidan said as pushed the button for his nurse. "Tell me when Miranda gets here."

Doctor Chakwas just nodded her head.

The nurse came in and walked over to Kaidan.

"What can I help you with Major?"

"Could you get me a wheel chair; I need to get some air."

"Of course"

The nurse went outside and grabbed a wheelchair. She helped Kaidan get into it and started to wheel him out of the room.

"Where to?"

"The chapel, please."

...

Kaidan had asked the Nurse to leave so he could have some privacy.

He looked up at the stained glass cross in front of him.

"I know I haven't been here in a long time... and I'm sorry for that."

Kaidan closed his eyes as tears started to shed from them.

"Please don't take her from me..." he whispered as he joined his hands together, and bowed his head.

"I can't imagine my life without her. From the moment I saw her I felt drawn to her. When she pushed me out of the way of the Prothean Beacon she saved my life, and risked her own."

Kaidan paused as he remembered himself running towards the Normandy with Shepard in his arms, with Ashley fallowing behind him.

"Ash, I know you're up there, please put in a good word for Kay..."

He face softened into a sad smile "I remember when I first called Shepard beautiful and you gave me hell for it...I'll never forget the sacrifice you made...The one you made, for us..."

"_Why me why not her?" he asked Shepard_

"_I'm sorry Kaidan" she said as she looked at him sympathetically, "I'd never leave you behind...I couldn't, you know that."_

"_I know." He said with a sigh_

"_And I am grateful but Ash died because of me, because of us."_

"_It wasn't your fault! It wasn't my fault; the only one to blame here is Saren."_

"_Yes Ka...Ma'am." Kaidan corrected himself quickly._

"_I'm...we'll get it done"_

He remembered how upset Shepard had been about Ashley's death, and how he comforted her. That and with the council putting them in lockdown, when they almost had their first Kiss before Joker interrupted them.

"_Shepard... are you alright? I'm sure there's a way to appeal, were under Alliance authority after all not the Council."_

"_Official channels are closed. They were quite clear about that." Shepard said as she sat down and leaned against a locker._

"_Closed...and were suppose to accept that? So where do you think the best view will be when the repear's roll through. If we have to sit it out may as well get a good seat."_

"_Were out of the game for now...I...I need you to be there while I figure things out."_

"_You know you can count on me...or any of the crew Kay."_

"_Come on Kaidan, I can get a salute from any one on this ship...Sometimes I need a shoulder..."_

"_Yeah...I always leave a way out, you know that...I'm here for you...but were in a rough spot, the last thing I want to do is distract you...Are we valued agents by the Alliance or are we not.."_

_Shepard smirked "Can't just get out a good old fashioned "It will be alright?" Can you?"_

"_It's that easy huh?" He smiled back "Okay then...Everything will be fine Kay. You'll figure it out."_

"_Now that wasn't so hard, was it?"_

"_I could get use to it...I guess we have some down time to figure out...what we are...what we mean to each other.."_

_Shepard started to get up and Kaidan held out his hand to her. She took it and he helped her up, and as she got up, she stumbled into his arms. She looked up at Kaidan and he looked down at her. Their faces just inches away from each other. Kaidan felt himself get __mesmerize__d by her electrifying blue eyes. She leaned into him and he leaned into her, their lips so close; that they could feel each other's breath. _

"_Sorry to interrupt Commander...got a message from Captain Anderson."_

_Kaidan's eyes never left hers as they reluctantly pulled away from each other._

"_Are you spying on us Joker?" Shepard asked irritated._

"_No...Ma'am. Just knew you were on the ship, thought I pass the message along."_

_She looked over at Kaidan and they both rolled their eyes._

"_The Captain said to meet him at Flux, that club down in the wards."_

"_We'll I guess you better go then..." Kaidan said looking at Shepard, not really wanting her to leave._

"_Yeah...ill umm see you around." _

Kaidan smiled. Leave it to Joker to interrupt them in a convenient time. He was so glad that the helmsmen had no idea of their engagement. He was sure EDI had something to do with it though.

Then there was that night...when they finally gave in to their love for one another. He could never forget that night, it meant everything to him.

"_Kay..."_

_Shepard turned around from her desk and saw Kaidan walking in to her quarters. _

"_Kaidan..."_

_Shepard sensed something was up. "What's wrong Kaidan?"_

"_What happens if this doesn't work out Kay? We mutinied. Stole a prototype warship. If they wanted to get technical, they could throw in kidnapping."_

"_We're a hell of an example of humanity's best and brightest, huh?"_

"_I keep reminding myself were doing the right thing. I don't believe me yet" Shepard sighed._

"_Well... If I didn't think you were doing the right thing ... I wouldn't be here. It will really hit the fan when we get to Illos...If things don't go well, I want you to know; Well... I enjoyed serving under you." Kaidan said as he stepped closer to Shepard._

"_Kaidan, you know how much you mean to me...I never felt like this with anyone else..." Shepard said as she stepped closer towards Kaidan._

"_You mean a lot to me to Kay...are you sure you want to... I mean there are rules against fraternization..."_

_He looked at Shepard making sure he didn't see her hesitate. He knew he just had to let it all go._

"_But you know what Kay, your right. About everything. I think about losing you can I can't stand it.."_

_Shepard looked longingly into Kaidan eyes._

"_The Galaxy will just keep going on. Everything, even the Reapers, will come around again. But you and I are what's important right now. And this is what will never happen again...US. " _

"_Even though I'm completely in love with you, I hope it does happen again, over and over." He thought_

"_Shepard...you make me feel..." he sighed "Human."_

"_Stay with me...here...tonight..."she whispered._

_Kaidan looked up at Shepard with love and adoration. He wanted more than anything to spend what could be their last night, together._

"_Are you sure ...Kay?" _

"_I'm sure Kaidan. You make me feel like I could take on the universe. And right now? I kind of have too." She looked up at, and Kaidan swore he saw the passion bursting through her eyes. "I never felt like this about anyone Kaidan...I've never had what we have between us. "_

"_I love you Kay," he said as she grabbed him into a kiss. _

_He leaned in and kissed her back. His hands found their way to her back and he started to caress it slowly. They slowly started to peel their clothes off each other. They had managed to gradually make their way closer to the edge of Shepard's bed. Shepard quickly took off Kaidan's remaining shorts and gently laid him onto the bed. He watched in awe, as she took off her bra, the last piece of clothing she had on._

"_You're so beautiful." he said in awe as she climbed onto the bed._

"_You're not so bad yourself!" she smirked as she made her way towards Kaidan. Her body hovered over his as she made her way towards him._

"_I love you Kaidan..." She said as she leaned into him, at the last second he flipped her over onto her back. _

"_I love you too Kay." _

_She smiled as his mouth grazed hers, and they gave into each other for the rest of the night. _

"But I was wrong...When I said we what had would never happen again...I didn't say it out loud then, but I wanted it to happen, I wanted us to be together. And it did happen! We were reunited, and I fell in love with her all over again. The future wasn't guaranteed to us back then, but with the reapers gone...we can finally be together, and not just for the moment, but forever...I want to spend the rest of my life with her.

He looked up at the cross in front of him again.

"I know you've given her a second life before. But please just give her another one!" He begged

"She's never asked for anything her whole life. She always puts the needs, and survival of others before herself...She saved the galaxy for goodness sake!" He cried as tears cascaded down his face. "That has to count for something!"

"Please just give her a fighting chance...she deserves it ..."

He looked up at the cross again.

"She deserves to live!"


	9. Chapter 9

******A/N:Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3**

**Thank you for all the reviews and adding this to your story alerts =) 3 dots are a flashback, just in case some people are wondering.  
**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter and feel free to leave any feedback.**

* * *

Doctor Chakwas and Miranda were huddled around Shepard's bed when Kaidan was wheeled back into their room. They both looked up at him as he too joined them by Shepard's bedside.

"Can you do it again?" Kaidan asked Miranda while he looked at Shepard.

Miranda looked at Doctor Chakwas, the doctor nodded her head.

"It can be done Major... The surgery's been scheduled for tomorrow morning. The brain damage done is very minimal from what the Commander suffered from the collector attack on the SR1."

Kaidan felt his body relax in relief.

"Why can't the surgery happen today?"

"There are a lot of preparations that have to be done before the surgery. I have to prepare a new team that has never done anything like this before. This is the first time anyone outside of Cerberus will know how to repair brain damage. "Miranda explained. "Before the Lazarus project there were only studies and experimental procedures going on."

Kaidan nodded his head in understanding.

"Do you know what caused the brain damage? Doctor Chakwas said you might have an Idea?"

Miranda looked at the scans in her hands.

"I've seen these patterns before somewhere but I can't remember where" she frowned as she stared at the scans.

"Well from what I see, right now we know how to reverse the damage done and should focus on that. We can find out later on how it happened but right now Shepard's health is our top priority." Doctor Chakwas stated.

Kaidan nodded his head, "I agree, we can find out later; right now this surgeries important for Shepard."

"Of course, you're right. I can do my research on these patterns later "Miranda said as she put the scans away in an envelope and handed them to Doctor Chakwas.

Doctor Chakwas nodded her head and took the envelope.

"I'll let Admiral Hackett, Admiral Anderson and the surgery team know about the preparation plans for tonight." Doctor Chakwas said as she walked out of the room.

Miranda nodded her head "I'm just going to examine Shepard's head. To make sure the team knows where the incision will be."

"Will you have to shave her hair off?" Kaidan asked quietly.

Shepard had always loved her long blonde hair. She told Kaidan it was the only reminder of her parents that she had.

"No Major, we won't have to shave all her hair off, just the area around the incision. " Miranda replied softly as she took pictures of where the incision would go with her omni tool.

"Thank you Miranda...for everything."

"You don't have to thank me for anything Major... I owe Shepard mine and my sister's lives" Miranda said sincerely, "She opened my eyes to what Cerberus really was..."

"I was so blinded by their protection and their belief in me... Then the minute I leave, they turn around and work with my father."

Miranda looked down at Shepard, attached to all the machines; she looking so fragile.

"Shepard was the one who truly believed in me, not just my abilities... but really believe in me, as a person. She's one of the closest friends that I ever had."

She looked up at Kaidan.

"I'm sorry about how you thought she was dead for 2 years...She really loves you, you know. The first thing she asked when she was conscious was where you were."

"I know, and I love her so much, the thought of even losing her is unbearable."

Miranda looked at Kaidan with admiration.

"I'm happy for you two, Shepard deserves someone like you."

She looked at Shepard's left hand and smiled."And Congratulations on getting engaged."

"Thank you." Kaidan smiled as he looked at Shepard and gently held her hand.

"You're welcome." Miranda smiled.

One of the marines guarding their room door came in.

"Ms. Lawson, Doctor Chakwas is calling for you; The Surgery team and the Admirals are ready for you."

Miranda nodded her head, "Thank you."

The marine nodded his head as he walked back to his post.

Miranda finished up her scans and picked up the files at the foot of Shepard's bed.

"Well, I should get going..." She said as she started to make her way out the room. Before she left she turned around.

"Don't worry Major, I'm going to make sure Shepard comes back just the way she was."

Kaidan couldn't think of anything to say so he nodded his head, as Miranda left with a look of determination on her face.

He looked over at Shepard again, holding her hand tightly in his. He didn't say anything; he just sat there silently in his own thoughts.

...

_It was morning, 2 days after Sovereign and the Geth had attacked the citadel. The Hospital had finally released Shepard from the hospital the night before. Everyone on the Normandy had gotten shore leave; Kaidan had gotten them a hotel room nearby. _

_Kaidan looked down at Shepard who was asleep, lying on his chest. Her arms were around his torso, holding on as if she never wanted to let go. He smiled has he combed through her beautiful platinum blonde hair with his fingers. He had been watching her sleep for the last hour. After seeing her limping through the rubble, it was a calming sight to watch as her chest rose gently and then fell gently again._

"_I could lie like this forever." He thought as he tightened his hands across her waist._

_He looked down and saw two blue eyes staring up at him. _

"_Look whose up."__Kaidan smiled, he felt her embrace around him tighten. He bent down and kissed her forehead._

_Shepard smiled as she snuggled closer to Kaidan._

"_I've been up for 15 minutes, just listening to your heartbeat."_

_Kaidan chuckled, "And I've been watching you sleep for the last hour"_

_Shepard looked up Kaidan, her eyes filled with compassion and love. _

"_I love you Kaidan."She said with tears forming in her eyes. "I've never felt this way about anyone before." _

_She kissed Kaidan softly on the lips. _

"_Growing up alone, I always felt that I never belonged anywhere." She said as looked off in the distance, "I never let anyone see that. I always thought if they saw my weakness; that would be the only thing that could break me." _

_Kaidan tightened his hold on Shepard's waist. "You'll never have to feel that way again Kay," He looked deep into her eyes; he cupped her face with both his hands. "I love you and I always will...You belong here, with me."_

_Shepard cried as she moved her head to kiss Kaidan's Hands then embraced him as she sobbed into his chest._

_..._

Kaidan closed his eyes as tears trickled down his face.

He felt and hand at his shoulder and turned around to see Garrus. Behind him were Tali, Joker, EDI, James, Jack, Grunt, Kasumi, Samara, and Liaria.

"She'll be fine Kaidan." Garrus reassured him.

"We're here for you man." Joker spoke from behind Garrus.

Kaidan nodded his head. Tali went over to the other side of Shepard's bed. Her mask hid her face but from the sounds of it, Kaidan could tell, that she too was crying.

"Oh Shepard, you don't deserve this!" Tali cried

Garrus went over and comforted her. Tali sobbed into his shoulder as he held her.

"She'll be okay, Shepard's a strong one." Samara said as she walked over to the end of Shepard's bed. "May the goddess allow this surgery to be successful, so she can awake and finally live her life after battling for the faith of the entire Galaxy."

"Yes, may the Goddess give her another chance," Liaria said, she looked over at Kaidan. "May the Goddess finally allow her peace and be with the one she loves."

Kaidan looked at Liaria with an appreciated smile. No words had to be said as Liaria understood.

"Shepard's strong, Krogan strong." Grunt spoke loudly. "She'll be up after this surgery, just watch."

Everyone nodded their heads in agreement.

"Hell yeah she'll be okay, she's the Commander Shepard after all." Jack said as she stood beside Samara.

"Lola will be alright. She's N7, a Spectre, and well, a badass in General." James grinned.

Kaidan couldn't help but smile. At first he was kind of Jealous at James calling Shepard Lola, but James was a good guy and a good soldier.

...

"_Lola eh?" Kaidan said as he leaned against the elevator in the Hangar Bay. He watched James working at his bench._

"_Yeah, James nickname for me." Shepard said as she pressed the button to go up towards her quarters. _

"_Yeah well, don't you think it's kind of weird?" Kaidan asked. "I mean you being his commanding officer and all."_

"_Kaidan... are you jealous?" Shepard smiled as she walked toward him. The door opened and Shepard playfully pushed Kaidan inside_

"_No...It's not that..." Kaidan started. The doors behind Shepard closed, and it was just the two of them._

_Shepard smiled as she put her arms around the back of Kaidan's neck, Kaidan gently placed his arms around her waist. _

"_You're so sexy when you're Jealous." Shepard smirked as she leaned in and kissed him on lips softly._

"_Hey...any guy would if another guy was flirting with his girlfriend." Kaidan grinned._

"_Well mister, you got nothing to be Jealous of." she grinned as she kissed him again, "I'm all yours...you're the only one for me." The doors opened to the level where her quarters were. Kaidan quickly scoped her up in his arms and Shepard couldn't help but let out a giggle. _

"_I know I don't, but I can't help it; you're so damn beautiful..." Kaidan said as he nuzzled his head against hers, and carried her towards her quarters._

_..._

"Commander Shepard's odds of surviving are great, considering what she's been through." EDI stated as she looked at Shepard. "The surgery will be successful."

"She's always been there for us, were here for her and you Kaidan." Joker said as he put his arm around EDI.

Kaidan looked around the room at everyone, all who had been on the Normandy as Shepard's crew at one time or another.

"I can't tell you how much this means to me...how much it would means to Shepard."

"You don't have to Kaidan...Shepard's our friend, you're our friend. Friends stick by each other in times like this" Joker said.

"Thank you." Kaidan got out as he looked at everybody. He then looked down at Shepard. "You hear that Kay, everybody's praying for you. We all know that you're a fighter and you're going to okay. Just keep fighting.

His fingers brushed her forehead, as he stared lovingly at Shepard.

"I can't wait to see those gorgeous blue eyes staring back at me."


	10. Chapter 10

******A/N:Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3**

**Hey guys I know its been a month, but this chapters a big one so I hope that makes up for it. I hope you guys like the flashbacks,I put them in so you can get to know who Kaylie Shepard is. Also it explains alot about Shepards and Kaidans relationship before Mass Effect 3.  
**

**Thank you guys so much for the reviews, follows, and favorites =)  
**

* * *

It was the morning of the surgery. Kaidan had been by Shepard's bedside since the nurse had wakened him up for his medication.

"Today's a big day..." Kaidan sighed as he held her hand. He caressed Shepard's engagement ring. "Today your going in for what I hope is one the last surgeries you'll ever have to go through. "

"Then you'll be off life support,and you'll finally be able to wake up." He finished as he he looked at all the machines attached to her. He felt his eyes start to water.

"I really miss those blues looking back at me Kay. I miss your smile...your touch...I just... I miss you so much Kay." He leaned in and kissed Shepard's forehead.

Tali had been right yesterday when she had said it was unfair for Shepard to go through all this after what she had been through these last few years. Life was never easy on Shepard, even when she was a kid.

...

_Kaidan had ordered breakfast for both of them while Shepard took a shower. He had ordered pancakes, scrambled eggs, sausages, and fresh strawberries. While they were on the Normandy, she had mentioned that she missed real food. Kaidan had made sure that he had gotten all her favorites._

"_She'll love it. " He smiled as he finished setting up everything._

"_Kaidan, I forgot to grab my shirt out of my bag, could you get it for me?" Shepard called out from the shower._

"_Yeah, sure." Kaidan replied as he went over to Shepard's bag and grabbed the shirt that was set on top. As he did, the bag fell over and he saw something fall out of the bag. He bent down and picked the paper up. It wasn't just a piece of paper, but a photograph. It was a picture of a young man and a woman who strangely resembled a lot like Shepard. The couple looked really young; about 18 years old in the picture._

"_Kaidan, did you find it ..." Shepard said as she walked out of the bathroom in a robe and a towel holding her wet hair. She stopped as she saw what was in Kaidan's hand._

_Kaidan looked up at her, with the picture in his hands._

"_Kay are these your..."_

"_Yeah...they are." Shepard interrupted as she went over and grabbed the shirt._

_Kaidan didn't know what to say. When he first meet Shepard she had told him she didn't have any. He had assumed that they must have died when she was younger. She had never talked about her parents and since she didn't, he never really asked._

_He looked over at Shepard as she slipped on her shirt. She was trying to avoid any eye contact with him. He walked over to her and delicately touched her shoulders._

"_Kay...if you don't want to talk about it... its okay but know that I'm here for you if you do."_

_Shepard Sighed as she looked down at the floor. "There's nothing to talk about Kaidan...They...They left me when I was only a week old."_

_Kaidan protectively put his arms around kissed her cheek softly. "I'm sorry."_

"_It's not what you think Kaidan." Shepard said as she slowly got up. She went over to the glass door where it looked out to the beautiful view of the Citadel. She crossed her arms, and leaned against the glass door. She closed her eyes as she went into deep thought._

"_They left me at an orphanage when I was a week old."_

_Kaidan sat on the bed, looking at Shepard. He could tell that it was hard for her to talk about her parents. On the Normandy, he learned that Shepard had never talked about her life outside the Alliance. That night before Illos she had let him know that he was the only one that she ever let her guard down for._

_"They left me there with only a note saying "Please take care of our baby girl. Kaylie Shepard. We can't give her the life she deserves."Shepard touched the glass gently with her finger._

_"When I was a little girl, all I could ever think about was why they didn't love me enough to keep me. Didn't I deserve to be loved?"_

_Kaidan got up and put his arms around her. He kissed her forehead. "You do deserve to be loved Kay...I love you."_

_Shepard leaned back against Kaidan's chest. She gently caressed his hands that were wrapped around her stomach._

_"I love you too, but when I was that little girl in that orphanage, I felt that nobody in the world loved me or even cared that I existed."_

_Kaidan didn't know what to say but just held on to her tighter._

_"There's no record of any baby girl named Kaylie Shepard born in anywhere near the Toronto Metropolis area."_

_Kaidan nodded his head. Shepard had told him that she had grown up on the streets of the Toronto Metropolis area._

_"I felt lost as a kid, not knowing where I was born. The orphanage tried looking for my parents but with so many Shepard's in Canada's biggest city, they weren't able too. It wasn't till I was 15 and I had joined the 10th street__ reds, that I actually started looking for them." She sighed as she closed her eyes._

_"I found out that a Daniel Shepard and his girlfriend Elena Myers were killed a month after I was born. I looked at the news story and saw their pictures; I knew right away that they were my parents."_

_She looked over at the picture on the bed._

_"I look almost exactly like her..."_

_"Yeah she does look like you..." Kaidan said as he kissed her head._

_"I know it may sound weird, but I carried around their picture because it reminded me that I came from_ _somewhere. Even though I didn't know the geographical location of that somewhere..." she looked up at Kaidan, "It reminded me that even though I was alone, at least I knew who I came from."_

_Kaidan took Shepard by the shoulders and looked deeply into her eyes. _

_"Kay, you know how I feel about you, how much I love you. You never have to question where you belong ever again. You belong here, in my arms," He took her hand and placed it on his chest "And In my heart. I'll always be by your side; you'll never be alone again."_

_A tear fell down Shepard's face as she looked up at Kaidan with an adoring look on her face.__"I'm so grateful that you walked into my life. You awakened a part of me that I didn't even know existed."_

_Kaidan leaned in and gently kissed Shepard. His cheeks rubbing off the tears that fell on her face._

_"Je serai toujours votres." he whispered._

_Shepard looked up with a confused look on her face. Kaidan chuckled. _

_"I'll always be yours."_

_She smiled as she cupped his chin. "Je serai toujours votres" She said in her best French._

_Kaidan just grinned as he leaned back into a kiss against Shepard._

_...  
_

Kaidan looked down at his chest, which read "Je serai toujours votres KS."

He wasn't the type of person who was into tattoos, but when he had thought Shepard had died aboard the SR1, he had gotten it inked on his chest where his heart was in memory of her. Now it stood as a symbol of their love, which he would always carry with him.

"Kaidan?"

"Huh" Kaidan said out loud and snapped out of his thoughts. He looked up and saw a Doctor Chakwas at the end of Shepard's bed.

"I'm sorry to have interrupted you Kaidan, but I have to prep Shepard for Surgery."

"Uh yeah...I'm sorry." Kaidan replied as he carefully removed his hand from Shepard's. Before he let go, he leaned down and kissed her hand.

"I'll be waiting for you." He whispered. He placed her hand delicately onto her bed as he backed his wheelchair away and let Doctor Chakwas in to do her work.

He cringed as he watched her inject Shepard with a needle. Doctor Chakwas looked over and noticed his discomfort.

"Maybe you should wait outside, Kaidan."

"Yeah..." Kaidan replied "I'll be right outside if she needs anything."

Doctor Chakwas smiled warmly as she nodded her head.

Kaidan watched Shepard as he rolled out of the room. He wasn't looking where he was going when he bumped into his mom.

"Kaidan honey, what are you doing out here?"

Kaidan shifted nervously in the wheelchair. "I ugh...I couldn't watch Doctor Chakwas injecting her with all those needles...and...Having to shave a part of her head...it's just too much to watch."

Diana Alenko placed her hand on on top of her sons.

"I know this is hard on you, but keep in your mind and in your heart; that when she wakes up you two will be together, and you can finally do what you promised her and marry her."

Kaidan looked at his mother and smiled. Since being in the hospital, he had been dreaming of Shepard walking down the aisle towards him in a gorgeous white dress.

"I know mom. Thanks for reminding me, and...thank you for being here for me. I know its hard being here when Dads MIA...but I'm sure he's looking for us as much as we're looking for him."

Kaidan's mom nervously played with the locket around her neck. "I'm sure he is."

At that moment they were interrupted by a couple of nurses and Miranda Lawson, heading into Shepard's room. Kaidan followed them in.

"Doctor Chakwas, has she been prepped?" Miranda asked as she looked at her clipboard.

"Yes Miranda she has. We should get going soon; I just called the surgical team and let them know we'll be down in 15 minutes."

"Excellent. Everything's been set up, and all the equipment we needed was brought in last night." Miranda said as she ticked off the clip. She looked at the nurses beside her and motioned them to take Shepard.

Kaidan watched as the nurses slowly wheeled Shepard toward the door.

"Wait..."

He went over and held Shepard's hand.

"I love you." He whispered. He leaned in and kissed her cheek. He pulled back and nodded at the Nurses to proceed.

As they rolled Shepard into the hallway with Kaidan behind them, the Normandy Crew was waiting for them. They all watched as Shepard was led towards the elevator. Kaidan and the others took the next one. No one said anything as the elevator rode to operation room floor. They all piled out and watched as the surgical team took Shepard into the Operation room.

Before going into the Operation room, Doctor Chakwas came towards Kaidan.

"Kaidan, I know you're going to want to be here in the waiting room throughout her whole surgery, but the Surgery's going to last 24 hours. With your injuries you can't be sitting in your wheelchair for more than 2 hours...as your Doctor I have to tell you to go back to your room...You can come back when she's out of surgery."

"No" Kaidan protested, "I promised I would be there for her. I can't leave her now."

"Kaidan, I know that but with your..."

"No" Kaidan interrupted her; he looked at Doctor Chakwas and gave her an angry glare. "You know I can't do that Doctor Chakwas."

"Kaidan, you just had major surgery only a few days ago. You should listen to Doctor Chakwas." Garrus said out loud.

"NO!" Kaidan shouted this time. "Don't you all understand I can't, I won't!"

"Kaidan..." His mother calmly said as she placed her hand on his shoulder. "Honey, I know how much you want to be there for Shepard but you have to also take care of yourself. What would she say if she saw you right now?"

"She..." Kaidan sighed, "She would give me hell and personally make me go."

"Exactly. Just go back to your room Honey."

"Mom, you don't understand." Kaidan said as he looked up at his mother. "The last time I left her side, she almost died again...I just can't..."

"Kaidan...She's in good hands this time. Miranda is on the surgical team, and she helped bring Shepard back to life. Not only that, but the best surgeons in the entire Galaxy are on that team. She's not alone this time Kaidan. You know she wouldn't want you to be disobeying doctor's orders after a major surgery."

Kaidan closed his eyes as he felt another migraine coming on. His mother was right. Even though he wanted to be there with Shepard, he couldn't physically.

"Fine, take me back to our room."

Diana Alenko just nodded her head. "Don't worry I'll be here for the whole time Kaidan." She said as she led her son back into the elevator.

"Yeah, were also here for her Kaidan." Tali said as she stepped beside Garrus who put his arm around her.

"Yeah man, you should take it easy." said Joker.

Kaidan just nodded his head as the elevator door closed. His mother had dropped him at his room. The nurse helped him get back into the bed.

He starred at the ceiling; every now and then he would glance at the clock.

_"Their 2 hours into her surgery now." He thought.  
_  
He reached over the night stand for the TV remote and turned it on. There was nothing except for news on life after the reapers.

"I'm Rose Smith, and welcome to BBC mornings news. It's day 5 after the war with the reapers has ended and the cleanup has slowly began in many parts of London..."

Kaidan zoned out as the reporter went on about how big Ben had managed to sustain only minimal damage. All he could think about was Shepard, and he knew until she woke up he wouldn't be able to rest easy.

"Everyday we have been bringing you the latest news on Commander Shepard..."

Kaidan quickly turned his attention back onto the reporter.

"Today London General Hospital released a statement saying that the Commander was going in for a vital surgery. They expressed that the surgery is extremely important in improving Commander Shepard's current condition. The commander is still listed in Critical condition, and has been since she was found 4 days ago. The hospital did not respond to further questions, as per security reasons."

Kaidan was thankful that the Alliance had decided to secure London General Hospital. Even with the war over, there still hadn't been any reports on if the Illusive man was found.

"In other major news, the Alliance and the rest of the Galactic fleets have yet to find the Illusive Man. The Cerberus leader was last seen fleeing Cronos Station which was the Headquarters for Cerberus operations. He was headed to the Citadel but no one can confirm or deny that he ever made it there. Fleets are constantly combing through the citadel in search of the Illusive man, but nothing has turned up yet."

Kaidan's blood boiled as he heard the words "the Illusive man." It was because of him that those misunderstandings had occurred on Horizon. The misunderstandings that had put distance between him and Shepard. He remembered the anger and hurt he felt when he saw Shepard on Horizon, and how it tore him up that he had treated her they way he did, and how that letter he had sent to her caused her to breakdown.

_Shepard,_

_I'm sorry for what I said back on Horizon. I spent two years pulling myself back together after you went down with the Normandy. It took me a long time to get over my guilt for surviving and move on. I'd finally let my friends talk me into going out for drinks with a doctor on the Citadel. Nothing serious, but trying to let myself have a life again, you know?_

_Then I saw you, and everything pulled hard to port. You were standing in front of me, but you were with Cerberus. I guess I really don't know who either of us is anymore. Do you even remember that night before Ilos? That night meant everything to me... maybe it meant as much to you. But a lot has changed in the last two years and I can't just put that aside._

_But please be careful. I've watched too many people close to me die - on Eden Prime, on Virmire, on Horizon, on the Normandy. I couldn't bear it if I lost you again. If you're still the woman I remember I know you'll find a way to stop these Collector attacks. But Cerberus is too dangerous to be trusted. Watch yourself._

_When things settle down a little... maybe... I don't know. Just take care._

_-Kaidan_

He hadn't gone on that date with the Doctor willingly, he was ambushed. He was just at the bar drowning his sorrows,when his friends had told him they had someone they wanted to introduce to him. He couldn't believe them, when they had introduced him to her, he just told them he had to leave because something from work had popped up. He just couldn't do it; the only person he had ever seen himself with was Kaylie Shepard. He didn't know why he had mentioned the so called "date" to her in the letter. He was so filled with his hate for Cerberus he couldn't see that his Shepard was still there. He remembered her reply that almost stopped his heart.

...

_Kaidan was back in his apartment on the Citadel from a recent mission. He hadn't been the same since Horizon,since he saw her. He sighed as he sat down onto his sofa. He looked over and saw the terminal light blinking. His heart started to beat faster._

"_Had she finally written back?" He thought._

_Kaidan nervously got up and checked his messages. He swore he felt his heart stop beating._

_It was an encrypted email but from subject he knew it was her. _

_Kaidan,_

_I'm sorry I didn't say enough on Horizon. All I wanted to do was to hold you and never let you go, to tell you that I love you. I don't know what happened, it's like after all those weeks I spent looking for you, and there you were in front of me and I was just speechless. _

_It was 2 years for you but for me it was only weeks. __When I woke up the first thing I thought of was you. When I looked around, only then did I remember what happened and even then I didn't know 2 years had gone by. __When I realised I was in a Cerberus facility, I wanted nothing to do them. I remember what they did Kaidan; I remember what they did to __Rear Admiral Kahoku._

_Then I was told about the collector attacks. Obviously I didn't take Cerberus's word on it, and investigated it by myself. I didn't join Cerberus, I'm only using them to get rid of the collectors._

_I went to the Citadel once I was done investigating and the Council didn't believe me when I told them that the Collectors were working for the Reapers. They thought I was delusional about the reapers, and still denied that they even existed. They just reinstated me, nothing more. The Alliance did more of the same. When I asked about you, Anderson told me it was classified. He refused to tell me anything about your where abouts. __  
_

_Do I remember that night before Ilos? Of course I do, that night meant everything to me... it was the best night of my life. Nothing's changed for me Kaidan, I'm still the same woman you fell in love with on the Normandy._

_I'm sorry this is probably so long. I should have written to you sooner. I've written this message a million times but didn't have the courage to send it. But that's not what the whole messages about._

_We're entering the Omega 4 relay tomorrow...and like you probably already know, no ship has ever made it through before. I just...I just want to say...just in case...if I don't make it... I've always loved you, I still love you, and I will always __only __love you. You were the only good thing that ever happened to me; the only person that made me feel like I belonged._

"_Je serai toujours votres."_

_-Kay_

_Kaidan sat frozen on the sofa. She was going through the Omega 4 relay. No ship ever came back. She might not come back. This couldn't be happening again._

_He quickly typed up a message_

_Kay, please don't do this. There has to be another way to stop them. I can't go through this again, I just can't. Please, talk to me in person...I want to see you_

_-Kaidan _

_The message pinged back, it couldn't go through._

_He ran his hands through his Hair. He could feel himself panicking. He had to stop her; he couldn't let her do this again. _

_He quickly got up raced to his terminal. Anderson, he would know what to do, maybe he could stop her. _

_"Major, why are you calling?" Anderson answered. By the looks of it Kaidan could tell he was still in his office._

_"I'm sorry for disturbing you Sir but this is important. It's about Shepard..."_

_"What about Shepard?" Anderson said as he raised his eyebrows in confusion._

_"She...She's crossing the Omega 4 relay, maybe as we speak."_

_"Yes, Major... I know." Anderson sighed, "The council has received word that a ship just went through the relay."_

_"What?!" Kaidan answered back. He felt like he was going to be sick. "But Sir you know no ships ever come back from the relay. She .." Kaidan swallowed as he tried to get the words out, "She might not come back sir."_

_"I know Major, I know. I don't like the circumstances but you know how Shepard is." Anderson sighed, "Don't worry though Major...She'll be okay its Shepard were talking about._

...

He only found out later on, that Anderson had a mole on Normandy while Shepard used Cerberus. He was thankful to the man for watching over Shepard.

"Major?" a voice called out.

"Huh?" Kaidan said as he snapped out of his thoughts. In front of him was Doctor Hart, the Doctor he had seen when he first woke up.

"Doctor Hart? What are you doing here?"

"Doctor Chakwas wanted me to monitor you while she's in surgery. She said your blood pressure has been a little high lately and you haven't been getting enough sleep..."

Kaidan sighed, "I can't sleep knowing my Fiancé's in critical condition."

"I'm sorry..." Doctor Hart didn't know what to say. "But I have to check your blood pressure Major."

Kaidan nodded as he just fell back and starred at the ceiling while the Doctor took his blood pressure.

When she was done, Doctor Hart looked down at the reading.

"Major, your blood pressure is really high today. It might be because of all the stress and lack of sleep." she said as she looked at Kaidan concerned. "You have to get some sleep major."

"I can't sleep, I try to but I can't."

Doctor Hart crossed her arms. "Well, I know today's a stressful day for you. So I'm going to give you something that will help you go to sleep."

Doctor Hart went over to the medical dispensary.

"This will help you to fall asleep. Just for today."

Kaidan took the pill from the doctor and some water and swallowed it.

Doctor Hart left the room, and before he knew it he was falling asleep.

_Kaidan looked around him; behind him he could hear the waves hitting the shore. He could smell the fresh cool breeze. He was at English Bay beach. He was dressed in his Alliance blues, and beside him was Joker. He looked out in front of him where hundreds of people were seated. He looked down and saw his mom who beaming at him. Kaidan smiled back. Here comes the bride started to play, and everyone stood up. He looked ahead of him and saw her._

_She was walking towards him, in a beautiful white long, flowy dress. She looked so beautiful. He couldn't stop smiling; he saw her doing the same. _

_Then everything went very slowly, he could swear he saw her drift away from him._

"_Shepard!" He cried out, extending his hand to reach her. _

"_Kaidan!" Shepard shout trying to run, desperately trying to reach him. _

Kaidan woke up startled. He looked around the hospital room. He was sweating and panting. He leaned back onto his bed as he pushed his hair back.

"_It was just a dream" He thought. _

He looked over as he saw his mom make her way to his bedside.

"Hey looks who's up." She said as gently touched his forehead.

"How long was I asleep for?" he asked looking up at his mom.

"For 16 hours. The doctors said you needed your sleep."

"How's Shepard?"

"She's still in surgery, but that's why I'm here to get you. The surgeries almost over. "

"Thanks mom." Kaidan said gratefully. He called the nurse and she helped him get into his wheelchair.

They made their way in front of Shepard's operation room door. Kaidan looked around and saw Normandy crew all sprawled out in the waiting room.

At that very moment Doctor Chakwas came out. Everyone got up, waiting for the doctor to say something.

She looked down at Kaidan, and smiled."The surgery was a complete success."

Kaidan felt tears coming to his eyes.

"She's going to be okay."


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3 **

**Hey guys!**

**I know it's been way to long for an update on this story. School, the holidays and life in general didn't allow me a lot of time post any updates. I had been writing here and there but nothing that was complete. I also wanted time to write this Chapter to add more feeling and emotion. I didn't want to rush anything. I did post up a Call of duty story that was sitting on my folder for so long to get something up, and I hope you guys check it out. But on to When this is all over. **

**This chapter is long so I hope it makes up for the long hiatus. I swear it won't take long for the next one. Maybe next week or the week after that being the latest. **

**Thank you, all of you for sticking around, reading, following and adding this story to your favorites. It is much appreciated and I haven't forgotten this story at all. **

**I think music also brings out so much emotion to a story so from now on I'll be posting songs that I think suit that particular chapter.**

**Song for Chapter 11: Breathe again - Sara Bareilles **

* * *

Kaidan took a deep breath in and gripped the bars as he took a step forward, keeping his left leg elevated and put all his weight on his right leg. His ribs had healed and doctor Chakwas had finally cleared him to start his physiotherapy and start walking using crutches. Of course he couldn't place weight on his left leg, which would still take a couple of more months to heal.

"Now major, does your right leg sting or feel abnormal when you take a step?" Tyler, Kaidan's physiotherapist asked.

Kaidan was lucky that only his left leg was broken. His right leg only received torn muscles and burns that the Doctors had managed to easily fix with a skin weave. Now that he was walking, the doctors wanted to make sure that the nerves and sensations in his right leg were alright.

"No it feels alright, just fatigued"

"That's what I'm here for. Doctor Chakwas wants you to walk only a little bit everyday so you can build up your leg muscles again. Sitting in a hospital bed for 2 months really took a toll on the muscles, since your body's use to being out on the field. That and torn muscles have a lengthy recovery time."

Had it really been 2 months? Kaidan swore it felt longer.

After Shepard's major surgery, the Commanders Brain activity had been brought back to normal levels; as normal as someone with severe head trauma could be. The only thing that was concerning was the healing time wasn't as fast as the doctors wanted or could be; but this time unlike the Lazarus project they weren't rebuilding Shepard, they were trying to hold her together.

Miranda and Dr. Chakwas had explained it to him that the best way they could.

_A couple of weeks after the surgery:_

"Why is the healing time taking so long Miranda?" Kaidan asked as he held onto Shepard's hand. "You said after the surgery her cybernetics would help her heal faster and she would be off the ventilator by now...it's been a week, what's going on?"

Miranda sighed as she bought up a file on her data pad.

"Major, we've had a week to piece what little we know on what specifically caused Commander Shepard's injuries. The information helps us in treating her better since this is the first time we've seen anything like this. No one has ever sustained injuries from a reaper cannon and lived..."

Kaidan's eyes widened, he couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You mean..."

"I'm afraid so, she was struck by the cannon on the way to the beam...no one else on hammer survived Major..." Miranda said softly." When hammer was making the push towards the beam, Harbinger took a shot at them...and he didn't miss. Most were vaporized instantly... it looked like they had all been decimated."

Kaidan was still shell shocked. That mean Shepard was the lone survivor.

"Major the only reason why Shepard survived was because all those cybernetic upgrades she had gotten in the Lazarus Project." Miranda interrupted as she pulled up a file and showed Kaidan the Data pad.

"For instance," Miranda said as the Heavy Bone Weave file came up. "The heavy bone weave was used to reinforce Shepard's skeletal system with a synthetic weave, which caused the bones to be almost unbreakable. In the event of bone trauma, the medi-gel conduits allowed for bone regeneration in a matter of days." Miranda finished.

"The reason why Shepard hasn't been healing as fast as she could is that the regeneration parts of the implants are no longer functioning." Doctor Chakwas answered taking point from Miranda.

"So there's something wrong with her cybernetics?" Kaidan carefully asked, trying to keep calm. "Wouldn't you have seen that when she went in for surgery the first time?"

"We did a scan as soon as she came in...2 implants weren't acting as they normally should." Doctor Chakwas said gently, "We only managed to fix the first one we encountered, the muscle weave. There was so much bleeding we had to make sure it was stopped first before we could go in any further. If we kept going, she could have bleed out."

"So wait..." Kaidan asked with his brows furrowing. "Two of her implants weren't acting normal, what about her other ones?"

"The muscle damage done to the heavy muscle weave was fixed easily but...You know that her skin has 2nd degree burns " Doctor Chakwas explained "We weren't able to place another heavy skin weave with the muscles healing and swelling...she would just reject the skin weave."

"What about the heavy bone Weave?" Kaidan asked as he looked at Doctor Chakwas. "You came across it when you repaired her leg..."

"The weave is holding the bone and doing its part...it's just the medical conduits no longer function. It's not an issue because those medical conduits aren't vital." Doctor Chakwas answered.

"So what you're saying is the structural component and main functions of the cybernetics are working fine but the benefits aren't?" Kaidan asked.

"Yes major...regeneration in a matter of days is not possible for Shepard anymore...with all her trauma we can't also inject or give her any anything that will help speed up the process without sending her body into shock." Miranda answered for Kaidan. "Of course with modern medication the healing time will still take half of what it took in the 21st century. It's just that we can't give her anything that isn't vital."

"I get it." Kaidan sighed with Relief, "It's just going to take good old fashion time."

He carefully took Shepard's hand and gently caressed the back of it. "As long as she's safe, I can wait forever for her.

...

"Major?" Tyler called out.

"Huh! Kaidan snapped back to the present. "Oh I'm sorry ... "

"It's alright, I know you've waited 2 months for this day."

"Yeah, it's a huge step towards recovery." Kaidan sighed as he walked back towards Tyler.

"Yeah it is. I'm sure Commander Shepard will be up and at it in no time." he smiled as he handed Kaidan his crutches.

"Thanks" Kaidan said as he grabbed them. "And you're right, knowing Shepard she'll be arguing with Doctor Chakwas in no time to let her out of her bed, and the Hospital."

Tyler laughed, "You're making me nervous, I might be her physiotherapist after all."

"Ah don't worry about it," Kaidan waved off. "You'll do great."

"Yeah well, see you at your next session tomorrow at 12." Tyler saluted Kaidan, "Best of luck Major."

"Thank you "Kaidan saluted back. He took a deep breath in as he walked out onto the hallway on his crutches and started to make his way back to his room.

He slowly walked in their room and noticed Doctor Chakwas, Miranda and Shepard's Respiratory therapist Garret.

"Kaidan." Doctor Chakwas said as she looked up from her data pad. "I'm glad you're here...before we start, you know that Shepard is still in a Coma...when we take her off the ventilator, it doesn't mean She'll wake up anytime soon...We don't know when she'll wake up, it might be days, weeks or even months.

"I know Doctor Chakwas...I know what it means. But this is a step forward, it shows she's fighting, it shows us hope." Kaidan stated.

"Of course, it does." Doctor Chakwas apologised understanding that Kaidan knew what was going on.

Kaidan took a deep breath in and sat beside Shepard's bedside. He placed his right hand into her left hand, kissing it softly. He looked at her beautiful face and carefully caressed the side of her face. He looked up at Garret, his hand never leaving hers.

"So how will you...wean her off?"

"I'll start with slowly reducing the oxygen levels, which will slowly reduce the number of artificial breaths per minute from the ventilator." Garret started, "I'll be regularly checking her blood and breathing every 15 or 30 minutes to ensure she adapts to the lower level of respiration. After I disconnect the machine, I'll take a sample test period off the ventilator, with ranges from 30 minutes to an hour and a half. If the Commander has trouble clearing her throat or breathing, then I'll place her back on the ventilator."

They waited a couple of moments while Kaidan sat there in his thoughts.

"Kaidan?" Doctor Chakwas asked gently, "Garret's about to begin."

Kaidan took another deep breath and looked at Shepard. He nodded his head.

Doctor Chakwas motioned over Garret. The respiratory therapist nodded his head and proceeded to the ventilator.

Kaidan watched Shepard as Garret lowered the oxygen levels. He held her hand tight the whole time.

"_Every time I look at you Kay, I feel like my breath gets taken away...Just like the first time I saw you." Kaidan looked at her with a smoldering look. _

_Shepard wrapped her hands around his neck. "I've never let anyone in before, I've always been guarded...but you managed to break your way in and I don't know what you did to me but I never want it to stop...I love you." _

"_I'll never stop loving you Kay, even after my dying breath." Kaidan whispered._

_Shepard placed her finger onto his lips. "Don't you ever say that; I don't know what I would do without you."_

_She looked deep into his eyes "There's no Kay without Kaidan..."_

Kaidan watched as he saw Garret reduce the oxygen little by little. A lone tear started to make its way down his cheek.

Doctor Chakwas placed her hand on his shoulder.

"The machine is giving the Commander a certain number of breaths per minute at a specific tidal volume. In between machine breaths, she's breathing spontaneously. "Garret explained. "The ventilator senses the beginning of the next spontaneous breath and synchronizes the machine breath with her respiratory pattern. As the commander progressively increases the tidal volume of her spontaneous breaths, I'm going to gradually decrease the set rate on the ventilator."

Kaidan nodded his head...He's been waiting months for this moment, just to see her chest rise and fall by herself again.

_The bright lights flooded the room, as he slowly opened his eyes and rubbed the sleep from them. He looked under his arm at his gorgeous girlfriend. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. He sat there for a moment and watched her chest rise and fall. _

_Something so simple was so beautiful. Rarely did he ever see Shepard take it easy and watching her sleep, she looked like an angel. He watched as her eyes fluttered and her bangs grazed her forehead. _

_He smiled; he could just sit here all day and just watch her._

_He watched as he saw bright blue eyes staring back at him._

"_What are you doing?" She asked groggily _

"_Watching you sleep...you look so graceful, so beautiful."_

_She snuggled closer to him and pulled him in for a kiss._

"_I love you."_

For the next hour, Garret slowly decreased the oxygen levels until he took out the tube completely

Then the moment that he had been waiting for, all those nights he prayed for one sign... and it happened. After 2 months of heartbreak, he watched as her chest rise and fall without the assistance of the ventilator. More tears began to cascade down his face.

Garret took out a needle and took a blood sample. He turned to the Nurse that had come in.

"Take this to the lab STAT." He gave her the sample then turned to Kaidan. "We'll be able to see the results in 10 minutes. Until then I'll be here just in case, but it seems like she's able to breathe on her own."

Kaidan looked at Shepard as his tears fell upon her bed. She was finally able to breathe on her own again. He leaned in and kissed her cheek.

"I knew you could do it, I'm so proud of you." He whispered as he gently caressed her cheek. He looked over at Garret.

"Thank you, she means the world to me."

Garret nodded his head. "Don't mention it Sir. It's an honor to have helped Commander Shepard after everything's she's done for us."

"If you need anything Kaidan, let us know" Doctor Chakwas said as she went over to the door. "We're just going to be next door, going over all of Shepard's stats.

"Thank you Doctor Chakwas."

Doctor Chakwas nodded her head, as she led Miranda out of the room.

With Garret working quietly on his own, Kaidan almost forgot he was even there.

He watched carefully as Shepard breathed in and out, making sure it wasn't a dream. He sat there for while until a nurse came walking in.

"Here's the STAT report you asked for." The nurse said as she handed Garret the Blood report.

"Thank you." Garret said as he grabbed the report and began reading it. He smiled and looked up at Kaidan.

"She's breathing on her own and her blood oxygen levels are normal. She won't need the ventilator anymore." Garret finished as he placed the report results onto Shepard's chart.

Kaidan sighed with relief. "I can't tell you thank you enough."

"Like I said Major, the honors mine...I'll leave two you alone now." Garret said as he made his way out. "But page me if you need anything."

"I will." Kaidan nodded. When Kaidan heard the door close he turned his attention back to Shepard. He held her hand and placed his other hand on her forehead, caressing it gently. He sat there for a few moments before he spoke.

"I know when you first woke up on the Cronos Station, you were alone and confused...I wasn't there by your side like I should have been." Kaidan began, "I know you already forgiven me for that, but I never really had forgiven myself. I couldn't... I mean I was so angry and thinking about myself that I didn't even think about what you had gone through. I promised you I would never hurt you and I broke my promise on Horizon. If you hadn't made it back from the Omega 4 relay I would never forgive myself, I wouldn't know how to go on. "Kaidan continued with tears streaming down his face.

"I promised you after the first surgery that I would never leave your side again. Even though we got to spend time together on the Normandy before coming to Earth to face the reapers, it wasn't enough. We've been far away from each other for far too long. I'll always be by your side, I love you."

"You know there's no Kaidan without Kay."

As he wiped the tears from eyes, Kaidan leaned down and for the first time since saying goodbye, he kissed her soft lips.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Bioware owns all; I just played Kaylie Shepard throughout Mass effect 1 – 3 **

**Hey guys!**

**This chapter is a long one as you can see. Its the longest one I have written for a story. I couldn't split it up because I couldnt stop half way through, or find a point where I could continue on to the next chapter. **

**It is a very emotional one, and I wanted to do it justice. So I took a little longer to write this one, going over my promise from the previous chapter. **

**Thank you again for favoriting and following this story. **

**Songs for Chapter 12: "I'm sorry." - Mass effect 3 official soundtrack**

** "An end once and for all." - Mass effect 3 official soundtrack **

**"I'm proud of you" -Mass effect 3 official soundtrack**

**"Wake me up when September ends" Green day**

* * *

Hundreds of thousands of pictures had been scrolling across the screen for the past hour. People making pleas for their loved ones to reach out to them if they were alive. Others mourning the ones they had lost. It made Kaidan hold on to her hand tighter, periodically caressing her ring. It also made him feel so grateful that he had her by his side, knowing she was safe.

Kaidan was watching the news on what was happening around him since he hadn't stepped out of the hospital.

The missing person's data wall had gone up a couple of weeks after the surgery. Attached with missing person's name, was a photo with all their information with a contact number. Liara had used her resources to manage and set one in every galaxy, in every planet, and every major city. The list grew longer and longer every day.

There was also a temporary memorial wall that it too was getting to long.

Kaidan's eyes had just scanned for that one name.

There was a knock at the door and Kaidan looked over.

"Mom?" Kaidan asked as he saw Diana Alenko walk in. Something was off. He has seen her face at the door and she had looked pale. He saw his mom put on a smile.

"Hey honey." She greeted Kaidan as she bent down and kissed his forehead. "How are you and Shepard doing?"

"Um...I'm okay and Shepard's still the same since the last night... she hasn't woken up yet." Kaidan answered as he looked carefully at his mother. "Mom are you okay? You don't look so good."

"I'm fine." She waved off, fiddling with her hands in her lap.

Kaidan gave her a stare as he took her hands into both of his.

"Mom, this your Kaidan your talking to...I know you too well, something's wrong." Kaidan delicately said as he looked into her eyes and saw the glint in her eyes missing. "What's wrong? Is it dad? did you hear from him?"

He saw his mother flinch as he mentioned his father. "You have haven't you...? Is he okay when did you hear from him...?"

Diana Alenko shook her head as she gripped his hand tighter. She looked up him with tears in her eyes.

"It's...not what you think Kaidan...it's not what we hoped for."

Kaidan knew what she was trying to say. Hope, that's what he and his mother had been holding on to. He knew the odds against his father but he hoped by some miracle that the alliances Intel was wrong, that somehow his father was still out there, fighting to live.

He got up in his bed and pulled his mother into a hug and she finally let the tears out that she was trying to hide from him. As Kaidan let his mother cry on his shoulder, his own tears had started to fall out as he remembered the last words he had said to his father in person.

_He was heading out to Alliance HQ. His mom and dad were walking him to the front door._

_"Well Dad, I guess this it... I don't know what will be my assignment after I testify but I know it'll be a while since we'll see each other next." Kaidan held out his hand to shake his fathers._

_Derek Alenko looked down at his sons hand and slowly shook it and as he did he pulled his son into a hug._

_"I'm proud of you Kaidan." Derek Alenko spoke quietly as he held his son. "I'm proud of everything you've done and how far you've made it. "_

_Derek pulled away, and placed his hands on his son's shoulders._

_"I know I haven't been there for you for the past 2 years when you really needed me...and I'm sorry for that..."_

"_Dad...it's not your fault...I pushed you guys away..." Kaidan started." I could..."_

"_No." His father interrupted as he shook his head. "Still...that's no excuse. I should have tried harder to get through to you." _

_He looked at the ground as he sighed. "Kaidan, ever since I was little I had dreamed of joining the Alliance, going out to space and exploring the universe. When I become a marine, I thought my life was complete until I met your mother. She became my world; I never thought I would love anyone like I love her. She gave me the greatest gift of my life..."_

_He smiled as he looked at his son."You." _

_Kaidan looked at his father in awe. He had never seen his father get sentimental like this._

"_When that shuttle went down and that Doctor told us that you might have brain cancer, it broke our hearts...but like the little solider you were, you beat the odds." He smiled. _

"_Growing up, you were so full of life, so energetic, you loved to play Hockey. When you were five you told me that you wanted to be a NHL star one day." Derek laughed. "I told you, that you could be whatever you wanted to be. That we reached the stars, so the stars weren't the limit anymore."_

_His father's face changed to a frown. "The day you came back from BAat, you weren't the same Kaidan I knew...You weren't the energetic son I knew..." He looked back at Kaidan._

"_When those men showed up to take you away, I didn't want to give you to them. They told me it was for your best interest. They said if you didn't go and learn to control your biotic's, you were not only a danger for others but yourself as well." He looked up at Kaidan again with his glassy eyes. "I couldn't lose my son...I had to do what I thought was best for you." _

"_I was wrong Kaidan...I wish I hadn't sent you with them...I wish I found another way...I'm sorry." Derek apologized._

_Kaidan shook his head._

"_It's not your fault for what Commander Vyrnnus did Dad...you couldn't have known what was going to happen...Shepard...she helped me see that..." Kaidan said as he placed his hand on his father's shoulder.  
_

_"Those experiences at BAat...even though they haunted me...they made me the man I am today...I wouldn't have been selected to serve on the Normandy...I wouldn't have meet Shepard."_

_Derek looked solemnly at his son. "You really love her don't you?"_

"_With all my heart." Kaidan smiled._

_His father's face broke into a smile. "Even though it goes against fraternization rules...I'm glad you're happy...and I hope she says yes."_

_Kaidan looked at his father questionably. "What? How did you know that I'm thinking about asking her?"_

"_He's the one who came up with the idea to give you the ring." His mother spoke out loud from the front door. _

_Kaidan looked back at his mother and then back to his father. "Wait...really?"_

_His mother nodded her head while his father just smirked._

_Kaidan went up and pulled his father into a hug. "I don't know what to say Dad...thank you for everything..."_

_Derek Alenko smiled as he hugged back his son. "Your welcome Kaidan...thank you, for allowing this old man to see the happiness back into his son's eyes."_

_Kaidan felt tears coming to his eyes. "I love you dad."_

"_I love you too son." Derek Alenko spoke as tears fell down his face._

_Diana Alenko stood there watching the two men she loved embrace each other. Her face was also drenched in tears._

"_My boys." She said out loud as she walked up and pulled them both into a hug. She had been waiting for this moment for a long time._

"_I hate to break this moment up mom, I really do...but I got to get going." Kaidan said as he pulled away._

_His father placed his arm over his mother. _ "_We understand Kaidan...take care son." His father said as he placed his right hand on his shoulder._

"_Please message your mother once in a while; you know how much I worry." His mother weeped as she wiped her tears._

"_I will mom." He said as he went to grab his bags._

"_Next time...when your back from wherever it might be...make sure you bring that girl home with you...I would love to meet my future daughter in law." Derek mentioned._

_Kaidan laughed."Don't worry I will Dad, I know you'll love her."_

_Derek Alenko just nodded his head. "We love you; take care of yourself out there."_

"_I love you guys too...Don't worry I will." He said to his father and mother one last time before he got into the taxi and left._

_.._

"I can't believe he's gone." Kaidan thought to himself as his mother cried on his shoulder. He felt her pull away from him and get up.

"I...I've got to get to Vancouver...your Uncle Kevin he made some of the arrangements but there still more a lot to be done.."

"Uncle Kevin?" Kaidan asked quietly. "Is he okay? "

Kaidan's Uncle Kevin was his father's brother. Like his brother, Kevin was in the Alliance but not as a solider but as a head engineer for the Point Grey.

"Yeah he's okay... he's in Vancouver right now...he was the one that contacted me." Diana started, "Were thinking of having his funeral tomorrow."

Kaidan looked up his mother. "Tomorrow?"

"The sooner we do...the sooner his soul can rest in peace."

Kaidan nodded his head as tears continued to rain down his face.

Diana looked down at her sons and Shepard's handed joined. The waiting game had really taken a toll on him.

"Kaidan... if you want to stay here with Shepard..."

"What?" Kaidan interrupted. "I wouldn't miss his funeral...I won't miss my last chance to say goodbye."

Kaidan then realised what his mother had said. His vow, that he would never leave Shepard's side.

"Shepard." He whispered as he looked down at her.

Diana Alenko nodded her head as her son understood what she had meant.

"It's okay I understand...he would understand."

Kaidan shook his head. "No, I can't ...I have too but...at the same time if Shepard wakes up and I'm not there..."

Diana Alenko placed her hand on Kaidan's shoulder. "If I learned anything through this war Kaidan is that don't ever take time for granted...stay with her because if she wakes up and you're not there...you're not going to be able to forgive yourself.."

"I know but..." Kaidan closed his eyes. Damn it, what was he going to do.

"Diana?" A quiet voice asked.

Kaidan and his mom looked up at the door. The tall woman walked inside towards them.

"Katherine?!" Diana Alenko cried as she hugged her sister.

"I'm so sorry about Derek Diana." Katherine consoled her sister.

"How did you know we were here?" Diana asked her sister.

"Kevin told me...he managed to get me clearance to allow me in this level... I heard there's a special patient on this floor...explains the guards at the door." Katherine explained as she went to her nephew bedside. "How are you doing Kaidan?" She asked as she gave him a hug.

"Not so good." Kaidan said as the tears streamed down his face as his aunt gave him a hug.

"I'm so sorry Kaidan...I know how much you looked up to your father."

Katherine looked over to the Kaidan's right. She didn't notice when she came into the room right away. She got up and made her way to the end of Shepard's bed.

"Those guards are here for her aren't they?" Katherine asked out loud as she looked at Shepard, trying to see her face.

"She must really high ranked to have had guards stationed here."

Kaidan couldn't help but smirk as his Aunt hadn't noticed that he was holding Shepard's hand earlier.

"Yeah...she is..."

Katherine looked at Shepard; it was hard to see her face with the some of the bandages covering it.

"I've seen her from somewhere before." Katherine pondered out loud. Then it hit her. "Commander Shepard?" She gasped. She turned and faced Kaidan. "Is it really her?"

"Yeah...it is." Kaidan answered.

"How did you end up in a room with the Commander Shepard?" Katherine asked her nephew.

"She...she isn't just the Commander." Kaidan explained to his Aunt. "She's my fiancée."'

"What?!" Katherine exclaimed with widened eyes. "When...how?"

"Its...it's a long story Aunt Katherine..." Kaidan answered for his Aunt. He would love to tell his Aunt about how Shepard was his fiancé, how they meet and everything but it just wasn't the time.

Katherine nodded her head in understanding. She could wait.

"Kevin told me you're planning the funeral for tomorrow?" Katherine turned around asking her sister.

"Yeah...I was planning to head to Vancouver after I told Kaidan."

Katherine nodded her head solemnly. "I'm here for both of you, family sticks by each other... you know I'm always here for you two."

Diana nodded her head. "Thank you; I wouldn't know what to do if I didn't have you guys." She cried as she pulled her sister and son into a hug.

Kaidan held on tight to his Mother and Aunt. After a few minutes his mother was the first one to pull away.

"We should get going, there's a lot to do...Kevin told me the graveyard where the Alenko family plots are, were barely touched by the reapers."

"The reapers had nothing to gain from those that were already gone." Kaidan explained.

His mother just nodded her head. "I love you Kaidan, and I know how much you wanted to be at 2 places at once but remember what I told you."

Kaidan wanted to say something but he just couldn't and instead he just shook his head.

"Wait...Kaidan's not coming to Derek's funeral?" Katherine asked both of them. "Kaidan, he's your father..."

"Katherine..." Diana shook her head at her sister. Katherine understood what her sister meant when she looked over at Shepard.

Kaidan didn't say anything; hell he didn't know what to say. He didn't know what to do.

Katherine went over and hugged her nephew. "It's okay Kaidan... " She whispered. She got up and looked at her sister. "Are you ready Diana?"

Diana was standing over Shepard's bedside. She held Shepard's hand and did a little prayer for her daughter in law. She then looked over at her sister, and nodded her head. The two started to make their way out the door.

"Mom?" Kaidan called out. "Please...say goodbye to Dad... for me."

Diana Alenko nodded her head as her tears fell onto her cheeks. "Of course Honey."

Kaidan nodded his head, and with that his mother and aunt walked out of the room. Kaidan got up and pulled over the wheelchair beside his bed. He got in and wheeled over to Shepard's bedside. Kaidan placed both of his hands over hers. Before he knew it he broke down in front of her. The gushing tears that he had hid from his mother spilled out, raining down his face.

"I really need you right now Shepard." He let out as he cried as he kissed her hand. "I need you so bad...to tell me it's going to be okay, to hear your soothing voice."

Whenever Shepard had told him it was going to be okay , even if you didn't know her you would believe her because the way she said it, they way her voice was so reassuring. It also helped that whenever she did say it, she was never wrong. After all they had made it through the reaper invasion.

"He would have loved you...you were everything he wanted in a Daughter." He smiled as he remembered how his Dad had talked about if his mother could have another Child he would want a Daughter, to balance out the scales he would jokingly tell Diana.

All those memories of his father started flashing in front of his eyes. Kaidan took out his Omni tool. He brung up his pictures windows. All those pictures throughout the years where in this folder. Kaidan smiled as he looked at the first one. It was taken when he was just born, and his Dad was holding him. The next one when he learned to walk, then the one after that his first Hockey game. Picture after picture Kaidan felt a great pain welling up in him. He wept loudly as he felt his chest getting heavy. He stopped as he tried to control himself.

"How can I miss his Funeral?" He asked out loud, angry at himself.

"You don't have to."

Kaidan looked up as he saw Joker walking towards him.

"Joker?"

"Your mom told me what happened as she was leaving." Joker explained. "I'm sorry about your Dad."

"I just can't believe he's gone...I thought maybe just maybe by another Miracle he would be alive."

"I know, it's hard when you lose someone you love." Joker frowned. "You should go to his funeral Kaidan...if you don't you'll regret that you never got to say goodbye."

"I don't have a choice, I can't leave her alone Joker."

"Yes you do, I'll stay with her." Joker explained as he sat in the chair across from Kaidan.

"Joker... You know I appreciate that...but after last time." Kaidan began.

"I know...so EDI came up with this." Joker said as he took something from his pocket and showed Kaidan. "It's a camera...so if she wakes up or just for your piece of mind... you can see her using your Omni tool."

Kaidan took the camera and looked at Joker. "Joker...thanks for going through all the trouble for this but it's not the same thing...I have to stay here... and..."

"No Kaidan." Joker interrupted. "If you don't go tomorrow Kaidan, you'll regret it trust me!"

"Joker...you don't understand..."

"The hell I don't!" Joker yelled as he got up from his chair. "I never got the chance to say goodbye to my Dad and my sister!"

"Joker?" A shocked Kaidan asked. "I'm sorry...I didn't know."

"That's because the only person that knows is in a Coma." Joker mumbled as he sat down in the chair.

"Shepard knows?" Kaidan asked carefully. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because...because it was too hard to even say it out loud." Joker sighed, "And Shepard only found out after I told an ill fated joke after Thessia."

..

"_So, Thessia huh? Guess the Asari are wishing they had fewer dancers and more commandos right about now." Joker said out loud as he turned around and looked up at Shepard."Too soon?"_

_Shepard's face scrunched up in anger._ "_In case you hadn't noticed, we just lost a few million people." Shepard angrily told Joker."This isn't the time."_

_Joker quietly went back to his computer and brought up a window. It showed a small planet._

"_You see this?" He said pointing to the small colony planet. "Tiptree. Little colony out in the ass end of nowhere. My dad lives there, so does my sister." _ _He punched in a few buttons. _

_Shepard watched as 3 figures rolled onto the screen._

"_Reapers rolled in about two weeks ago." Joker said vacantly as he stared hard at the screen. _ _He then turned off the screen. "So you can assume that I'm generally aware there's a war on, Commander." _

"_So why the jokes?!" Shepard commanded sternly. _ _Joker turned his chair back around and faced Shepard._

"_Because EDI says that according to your armor's metabolic scan's you're under more stress now than during the Skylian Blitz." He said as he narrowed his eyes. _

_"Like more than Elysium, where it was pretty much you versus 10,000 Batarians trying to kill you. And the last time I had a briefing with Anderson, he told me to take care of you." Joker exclaimed as he pointed at himself then at Shepard._

"_The guy leading the resistance...on Earth! Is worried about you, and I'm supposed to help?!" Joker laughed sarcastically_.

_Shepard sighed. _ "_I appreciate the thought, Joker but I'm fine." She assured him._

_Joker shook his head. "The hell you are. You're like half a robot at this point." He looked over to his left."No offence EDI." He then looked back at Shepard. "And it's all my fault." He sighed._ "_When the Collectors blew up the first Normandy, you died because I wouldn't leave...because you had to come back from me." Joker refused to meet Shepard's gaze._

_Shepard smiled as she shook her head and shrugged her shoulders. "Couldn't leave the best pilot in the fleet behind could I?"_

_Joker couldn't help but let out a little smirk. "Yeah, well...I guess that would've looked bad on your report." He said as he turned his chair around._

_Shepard sighed as she walked up behind Joker and placed her hand on his shoulder._

"_I'm sorry...I'm sorry for reacting the way I did...I didn't know about your Dad and your sister."_

"_How could you, I never told anyone what happened." He mumbled. He turned back around and faced Shepard again. "And I'm sorry I made that joke about the Asari...they aren't my favorite aliens right now."_

"_What do you mean?" Shepard asked confused._

_Joker looked down at the ground trying to hold his tears before the commander but he couldn't._ _He looked up at her as tears started to fall. _

_"I ugh...I found out that an Asari Commando squad was sent to help out Tiptree...When I went to Hureta Memorial to find out if Hillary made it out...I found out that she didn't."_

"_Oh god, Joker I'm so sorry." Shepard cried as she placed her hand on his shoulder to comfort him._

_Joker just nodded his head as he continued. _ "_She...she was killed by an Asari Commando..." He cried._

"_No..." Shepard said out loud as she shook her head. "It can't be...Joker...are you sure?"_ _Joker nodded his head. _

_"SHE KILLED HER SHEPARD!"He shouted as he cried."They were suppose to help her but they ended up killing her!" _

_Shepard pulled Joker into a hug as he started to cried. She didn't know what to say but to comfort him. No wonder he had made that joke...no wonder he wasn't as mad as Shepard was about Thessia._

"_Why did she kill her Joker?" She asked quietly. _

"_The Asari Commando... she managed to save Hillary but when she tried to save prisoners at a Farmhouse, they were indoctrinated and they turned on her and Hilary. The Asari killed the farmers to prevent them from becoming husks or indoctrinated infiltrators. She managed to find a hiding spot for her and Hilary but..." Joker swallowed as he tried to get the words out. "Hilary...Hillary broke her leg and she was whimpering from the pain and the Asari...she...she killed her so wouldn't give away their hiding spot."_

"_I'm sorry Joker." Shepard said as she hugged him again._

_Joker nodded his head as he pulled away from her. "Thanks for being there for me commander." He said as he wiped away his tears. "But please don't tell anyone about this."_

"_Why?" Shepard asked confused._

"_Because I'm the pilot, everyone trusts me to fly them safely in and out of danger. I don't want anyone to second guess that because of what I'm dealing with." He explained. _

"_I understand Joker; you don't want anyone to have any doubts about you. But you know that if you need anyone to talk to you, you can always talk to me." Shepard said comfortingly._

"_Yeah I know Commander...thanks...for everything."_

_..._

"Wow...Joker...I'm sorry." Kaidan sympathized.

Joker nodded his head as he wiped the tears from his eyes.

"I didn't hear any news about my dad...and the only evacuation survivors were kids. I never got to say goodbye to them Kaidan. Everything is a mess on Tiptree...the Reapers devasted the whole planet. I might never get a chance to say goodbye. But you do." Joker finished as he looked up at Kaidan.

"Go, I'll be here with Shepard. You know what Doctor Chakwas said...it may take a while for Shepard to wake up...She wouldn't want you to miss your chance to say goodbye Kaidan...it's not what she would want."

Kaidan looked over at Shepard. Joker was right...Shepard wouldn't want Kaidan not to say goodbye. Shepard grew up without any parents and Kaidan knew that even though she never let anyone else know, she had wanted that her whole life.

Joker watched Kaidan watching Shepard. "I'll be right here Kaidan and you'll be able to watch her through the camera."

Joker walked over and put the camera on the table beside Shepard, facing Shepard.

"Bring up your Omni tool." Joker asked. Kaidan showed it Joker and after a few minutes Joker was done.

"There you go." Joker said as he finished the last codes. "It's all set and ready."

Kaidan looked at his Omni tool as he brung up the Camera program. There he could see Shepard clearly.

"Joker...I don't know how to thank you..." Kaidan smiled gratefully at Joker.

"You don't have to thank me...just go in the morning; I already booked a shuttle for you."

"Morning?" Kaidan asked confused.

"I know you won't be able to spend the night without her...Makes sense to leave in the morning." Joker shrugged as he started to leave. "I'll be here at 7:00 am, your shuttle leaves at 7:30 am."

"Thank you Joker." Kaidan said sincerely as the Flight lieutenant nodded his head and left the room.

Kaidan sat quietly in the room as he worked on his Omni tool. Before he knew he had drifted off to sleep.

...

10:00 Am the Following morning,

Mountainview Cemetery

Vancouver, BC, Canada.

Kevin watched as the people his brother knew all these years piled in to pay their respects. The reapers had decided to leave this place alone, it was barely touched. Of course what would they want with a cemetery? He had been here on to many occasions, to bury his parents, and now he was here to bury his older brother.

He looked over at his sister in law who was sobbing uncontrollably over her husband's open casket. Her sister, Katherine holding her as she spent the last moments saying goodbye to her husband. Derek's portrait right beside his casket; taken in his Alliance uniform the year he retired. Kaidan looked so much like his father...he had since he was little.

He really wished his nephew could be here, that he could say goodbye to his father. He knew his nephew had a good reason, Diana had explained it to him. He still couldn't believe his nephew was engaged to Commander Shepard. At the same time, after what he saw at the medal ceremony on the Citadel after the Geth invasion, he knew something was going on between them. The way that Kaidan kept looking at Shepard, the way a soldier didn't normally look at to their superior. He was happy for Kaidan, after all he had been through he deserved to be happy.

"Is everyone here, are we ready to begin?" The priest asked Kevin.

"Yeah I think..." Kevin stopped as he looked up and saw him walking towards them on crutches.

"Excuse me; just give us another 5 minutes." He told the priest as he walked passed him and walked towards him.

"Kaidan?" Kevin said to his nephew as he walked up to him and pulled him into a hug. "I'm so glad you're here."

"Yeah...me too." Kaidan sighed as he hugged his Uncle.

Kevin pulled away from his nephew.

"Your mother said you weren't going to come...that you were staying by Shepard's side."

"Yeah... I was going to until someone gave me this." He said as she showed his Uncle his Omni tool. Shepard came up on the screen.

"So, you really did get engaged to Commander Shepard." Kevin asked his nephew already knowing the answer.

"Yeah...I'm sure Mom already told you."

Kevin nodded his head. "I'm happy for you Kaidan...I'm glad you're here."

"I'm glad I'm here too. " Kaidan solemnly said as he looked ahead and saw his father's portrait and his mother being by his Aunt.

He started to walk his walk his way towards the open casket. As he did he saw soldiers that he served under his Father. Everyone's eyes were on him as he made his way towards the front. His Aunt Katherine looked up as he approached the casket but Kaidan placed his fingers on his lips and shook his head. She nodded her head in understanding and slowly let go of her sister as Kaidan slipped in and took her place. Kaidan enveloped his mother in a tight hug. Diana Alenko looked up as she felt someone else's arms around her.

"Kaidan?" She barely got out, her face puffy and red.

"Yeah mom, it's me...I'm here." He said as he gripped her tighter and kissed her forehead.

"Kaidan, he's gone...he's never going to come back!" Diana cried as she hung on to her son.

"I know mom...but he'll always be in our hearts." Kaidan consoled his mother. "He'll live on in our memories forever."

They stood there for a couple moments before his Aunt came and took his mother under her arm and escorted her back to her seat, leaving Kaidan alone to say his final goodbyes.

Kaidan looked down at his father. He looked so peaceful; He was dressed in his Alliance dress blues, his hands lay peacefully across his chest. Kaidan felt the tears starting to roll down his face. He remembered the time he first saw his father in uniform leaving with the Second Fleet during the first contact.

...

_6 year old Kaidan watched as his father and mother walked to the front door. His father put down his bag then held his mom by the shoulders._

"_Diana, I'll be okay." Derek Alenko comforted his wife. "You know those folks in Shanxi need us."_

"_I know they do Derek, but excuse me for worrying about you. We don't know anything about this Alien race; we don't know what their capable of. If something were to happen to you... I..."_

"_Shhh." Derek interrupted his wife as he placed his finger on her lips. "Don't finish that sentence. Nothing's going to happen to me. You'll see, as soon as were done kicking these Aliens ass from here to the sun, I'll be back before you know it." _

_Diana jumped into her husband's arms and hugged him tightly. "I know...just be careful okay? You got a wife and a son that love you and will be waiting for you."_

_Derek leaned down and kissed his wife. "I know...and I will." _

_He turned around and looked down at his son. He walked towards him and got down on his level. He gently placed his hands on Kaidan's shoulders._

"_Kaidan...you know while I'm gone you're the man of the house." Derek smiled at his son."You take good care of your mom okay?"_

_Kaidan nodded his head. He watched a tear roll down his father's eye._

"_I'm going to miss you little buddy." Derek cried._

_Kaidan reached up and wiped away his father's tears. He looked his father in the eyes and grinned._

"_Don't cry Daddy. You're going to go be a hero and save all those people from the bad Aliens." Little Kaidan smiled. "You're an Alliance solider, better then batman, superman, or even Spiderman!" Kaidan exclaimed waving his arms._

"_You're my hero Daddy!"_

_Derek immediately hugged his son as his tears fell on top of his head. "I love you Kaidan...my brave little boy."_

"_I love you too dad." Kaidan smiled."And don't worry I'll take good care of mommy!"_

_..._

Kaidan cried as he remembered that day.

"You've always been my hero Dad...ever since I was a little boy." He cried as placed his hand gently on his Dad's. "Seeing you here...knowing that you're really gone, It hurts so much...I'm sorry that we didn't get to spend enough time together as we could together... I'm sorry for every stupid fight I picked with you growing up...I'm sorry for staying so distant for so long and I'm sorry that it wasn't soon enough... I love you daddy...I miss you so much." Kaidan cried out as he went in to hug his father.

Kaidan felt a hand on his shoulder; he slowly got up and turned around. He hugged his uncle as he cried into his shoulder.

Kevin patted his nephew on the back as he held onto him.

"Come on Kaidan...you got to be strong for your mom...she need's you right now."

Kaidan nodded his head as he wiped the tears from his eyes.

"Your right Uncle Kevin."

Kevin nodded his head as he put his hand on his nephews shoulder. "Come on, the service is about to start...let's sit down."

Kaidan nodded his head, as his Uncle helped him down to his seat.

He sat beside his mother and put his arm around her protectively.

The Priest made his way to the podium. He looked at Kaidan's Uncle, and Kevin nodded his head.

"Thank you for everyone that made it here today." The priest started as he looked out to the seats in front of him. "Today we are gathered here to say goodbye to Derek Alenko, a husband, a father, a son, a brother, and a soldier. Derek joined others like him, to fight and protect the people around them. Even though he had retired he couldn't stand back and watch the reapers destroy and kill innocent lives. He didn't hesitate to reenlist; He was a solider until the moment he died. As we mourn his death and our loss, we can't forget the reasons why he fought. He fought so others would have a chance to live; he fought so earth could be saved, so the Galaxy could be saved, so life would be able to live one.

Today were here to honor Derek and others like him because of their sacrifices we are here, alive and breathing. We will be able live and see a future that Derek and many like him will never see. While we have many challenges ahead of remember how we got to this point. The war is over, the reapers are defeated and against all odds we all came together and together we defeated the greatest threat this galaxy has ever seen. Together we will move on, and continue what Derek would have wanted, build a greater future. Together, we will honour Derek, and those men and woman who died to give us that future."

The priest paused. "Now, Derek's son, Major Kaidan Alenko, would like to say a few words."

Kaidan slowly handed his mother over to aunt. He got up and made his way to the podium.

He sighed as he looked out to all the people in front of him, all who knew his father at one point or another. He cleared his throat as he opened his mouth to speak.

"My Dad's lived his whole life in Vancouver. As a child he loved when his father would take him to the Alliance bays where he worked on building and repairing ships. It was in his blood, and when he was old enough he enlisted in the Alliance. He served in the first contact war, with the second fleet. He loved serving and protecting the people he loved. He's the reason why I joined the Alliance; he made me the man I am today.

I remember when I first saw my Dad in uniform. I was so amazed, that from that moment on I wanted to be a solider fighting along with the Alliance, just like him.

He always made time for me, and he made sure he never missed one of my Hockey games. He was there for everything, and we were inseparable.

We drifted apart when I was a teenager, like...like every teenager does..."Kaidan paused as flashes of him being sent to BAat. He remembered how he lashed out his father

"_Don't let them take please! I don't want to go" Kaidan begged his father._

_"Kaidan...it's for your own sake it'll help you." His father told him._

_"Sending me away from my family, from everyone I love is helping me?" Kaidan looked at his father with pleading eyes. "Please Dad; I want to stay here with you guys!"_

_"Son..." Derek Alenko reached out and tried to touch his sons shoulder._

_Kaidan shook his head slowly and backed away from him._

_"No...Don't because if you really cared you would let me stay. Kaidan turned around as the men lead him to the car._

Kaidan looked out to the crowd, tears streaming in his eyes as he began again.

"But...later on, as an adult someone told me that I was lucky to even have a father, that even though what had ever happened between us, we could overcome it. I took that person's advice, and we started talking again. We didn't get to spend a lot of time together like we should have, I should have made a bigger effort when he retired, and I wish I had gotten to spend more time with him. What this war has taught me is that time is precious. We get caught up about thinking ahead but we forget to enjoy and really live life along the way...

He'll never get to meet his daughter in law, he'll never get to dance at my wedding, and he'll never get to hold his future grandchildren." Kaidan said as he wiped his tears. "I will always follow the example he has shown me. The way he loved my mother, and the way he made sure I was always happy as a child."

"Today I am the man that I am because my father. Because of him I am an N7 marine, because of him I am a spectre. "

Kaidan paused."I'll never forget him, I'll always miss him...and even though he's gone, he'll live on forever in my heart. He has always been and always will be my hero..."

"And now, I'll be playing a slideshow for you all that I made in honor of my father."

Kaidan went over to the screen and the slide show started. He made his way back towards his Mother, Uncle and Aunt. As he sat down his Uncle Kevin patted him on his shoulder.

"That was beautiful Kaidan; your Dad would have loved it."

Kaidan nodded his head, as the first picture of his dad as a baby popped up, and Green day's "Time of your life" started to play.

Kaidan watched as photo after photo of his Dad's childhood scrolled by. His arms wrapped around his mom tighter as she too watched. All those memories , and emotions rushed through him as the slideshow transitioned to his father's teenage years, the once or twice in a year snowfalls in Vancouver, when his parents meet, their wedding, when he was born, his first hockey game as his dad was watching, all the memories of the past 61 years of his father's life. The final picture, taken the day he had left to testify in front of Alliance Brass.

The slideshow ended and the military bugle started, and Kaidan stood tall and raised his hand towards his head in salute. Six alliance officers stood up and proceeded to fold the Alliance and Canadian flag that draped over the casket. One of the officers walked over and with both flags and kneeled down to Diana.

"On behalf of the Systems Alliance, and the nation of Canada, please accept this flag as a symbol of our appreciation for your loved one's honorable and faithful service."

Diana cried as she nodded her head and placed her hand on both flags. Katherine placed her hands around her sister. Kaidan and his Uncle stood in salute as the bugle started to play the "Last Post".

The officers picked up the casket. Kaidan couldn't help but to walk over and grab hold of one end. The officer that stood there nodded his head in understanding and saluted Kaidan as he went to stand by the commanding officer. They walked over and placed the casket over the plot. Then the gun salute started; Kaidan and the officers around him stood tall in salute. Kaidan watched as his father's casket lowered into his plot. As it did, the tears came back and everything about proper etiquette couldn't stop him as he cried silently, and saluted his father.

"Goodbye...I'll never forget you. "

* * *

**A/N: That one was a long , hard and sad chapter. **

**If your wondering about Jokers sister Hilary, if you go to Huerta Memorial Hospital on the citadel, theres an asari talking to an asari psychotherapist about relating the story of her last assignment on the human colony Tiptree, were she encountred a girl named Hilary, Hilary was Jokers sister.  
**


End file.
